This Old Machine (2017) User Reviews

Waste of Time

[shakeel-arshad · 2/10 · 17 August 2018]

The only thrilling thing about this movie is that it ends, poor performance from everyone involved, save your time, stare at the wall instead.

Boring and Vague

[leighterri · 2/10 · 11 March 2019]

Horrible movie, acting was terrible. So vague in certain aspects too hard to figure out. I was really disappointed although the story line could have at least gone somewhere more.

What was I thinking

[wanderer15701 · 3/10 · 19 March 2019]

Kept hanging on thinking I would get some satisfaction but it never happened..Story is full of unexplained holes..The 2 actors I recognized should have never agreed to that movie,it just puts them closer to unemployment

Waste of time 2.0

[chanepretorius · 1/10 · 26 January 2019]

Took the advice of the previous review and watched wall. Great experience.

The reviews are really not fair!

[Vestron-Pictures · 5/10 · 26 August 2020]

For sure this isn't a masterpiece, for sure the movie is even boring most of the time, but there's still some interesting sequences and some correct acting. When I've see the rating was under 2 stars I was kinda surprised! Particularly when some Asylum movies have a way better overall ratings! Honestly this movie is way better than 99% of the Asylum titles and deserve to have a less negative rating. I can't strongly suggest to have a try but if you have an opportunity to watch it don't be too repulsed with this idea, particularly if you like Lance Henriksen.

My real rating is probably 3.5 out of 10, the 5 is only to correct the awful overall rating over Imdb.

Yes, watch a wall instead

[mauricioaguiar-1 · 1/10 · 27 February 2020]

Those reviewers who said you should watch a wall instead were right. A total waste of time.

What the heck did I just watch?

[alliewayfilms · 1/10 · 7 July 2019]

I should have read the reviews first. OMG could they have kept shots on a person with no dialogue for any longer?? As a filmmaker who has made NO BUDGET to low budget, this was amateur hours with recognizable talent. Someone give me the amount that this film was made on and I will make 2 better films. Writing, directing and acting from the smaller names was horrible. I couldn't give less than one star or I would have given NONE.

Don't watch if you can't laugh with bad movies

[Marcododin · 4/10 · 10 July 2020]

I managed to have a good laugh at this nonsense, which I dare not describe, but I think that we are not facing a new "The Room" (that crazy film by Tommy Wiseau) here.

I am confused...

[Pappa_Chainsaw · 1/10 · 12 December 2023]

I will not say this movie was trash (as many have said) I will not say the actors did a bad job (as some have said) I wont say bad things about the director (as others have said) ...what i will say is i had difficulty understanding where the story was trying to go... I feel it could have been expressed better... characters were not introduced well, they came and went and it was only later you discover who they are if you ever do... they weakly hint at his genitals being cut off(?i guess?) and sorta hint at his memory loss... you get at the first her parents hate him but mutilating him and leaving him as dead (plastic bag over the head says they were trying to end him and failed)...? That seems extreme... she says he tried to kill her but it never shows him doing anything like that... and why would you leave your sister out of the loop? ...doesn't that just scream we don't care if you go through emotional trauma thinking your sister was kidnapped and/or murdered??? ...not a very good sister (or family) if you ask me... and please someone tell me why was there an injured rabbit under the second floor floorboards? What was that about? Because apparently it was the karmic justice for this whole piece.... anyway, I've seen worse.

Horrible

[gramma_elaine · 1/10 · 9 October 2019]

Can't believe Kevin Sorbo acted in this. Bad langage, bad plot, awful ending. Wish I hadn't wasted my time.

Creative piece with extraordinary vision.

[joey-vasatka · 10/10 · 29 September 2019]

This film was full of beautiful shots. Special FX makeup was on point. Acting was good and Kevin Sorbo was... well.... Kevin Sorbo. Good movie. I want more from this film maker.

Flawed, but engaging, gritty low-budget minimalist thriller

[joseph_dixon63 · 7/10 · 25 August 2020]

I can't relate to the low opinions and star ratings. I'm convinced that the director executed his artist and story-telling vision. The movie portrays high, messy humanity at its worst, and the actors come across as real-life individuals -- no make-up, no beautiful people, no perfect statements/lines,... no contrivances. The acting was real people talking as real people talk and real people do. I feel Henriksen was particularly effective. This movie is life with a little 'l' delivering Life with a big 'L' truth about the human condition. I found it engaging and effective at establishing and sustaining authentic dramatic tension. I still don't like shaky-cam, but here I think it worked; and, sure, there was loose end or two remaining, but life has loose ends, and the story remained focused.

Quite possibly the worst movie I have ever seen.

[knifemanak · 1/10 · 25 April 2021]

This movie is downright awful. I only watched it for Kevin Sorbo, whos character in this was very confusing. I have no idea what role his character actually plays in the story. The acting was just awful,, it was so so bad.. Kevin was the only person in this movie who can act. The old man was alright, the rest of the actors were terrible. Most of this story does not make any sense. The ending is terrible. The camera man needed to be fired and banned from movie making forever. The wife is one the most annoying characters I have ever seen. She goes on and on about how terrible her husband is and yet he was never rude to her once, but she was constantly being rude to him, yet her family hated him for some unexplained reason. The characters had no idea what they were doing. They did not know how tonhandle a firearm properly at all, nothing they did was thought out. They were just a couppe of idiots running around looking the man's wife with no idea of what they were doing. Most of the actors in the Movie are ugly as HELL too! It is as if they sought out the ugliest people they could find for this movie. Maybe only really ugly people would apply for the roles.