- Danny: We're always on the lookout for great sales people. I think we could make you happy.
- Penny Hofstadter: Thanks, but I'm pretty happy.
- Karen: I could be more happy.
- Penny Hofstadter: Tell it to your shrink, Karen.
- Danny: We control 60% of the market. Hell, commissions on just our fungal cream will put you in a new Mercedes.
- Penny Hofstadter: Danny, Danny, look at me.
- [points to her face]
- Penny Hofstadter: Does this face sell fungal cream? No, this face is cholesterol drugs and above.
- Leonard Hofstadter: Wow, that's a lot of luggage for a weekend.
- Penny Hofstadter: You know, I didn't know what to wear, so I brought a few options.
- Leonard Hofstadter: Was one of the options, the option to never come back?
- Howard Wolowitz: Engage them for one minute and take note of their reactions.
- Leonard Hofstadter: There's something familiar about all of this.
- Howard Wolowitz: Okay, go.
- Sheldon Cooper: Hello, baby, are you having a pleasant day?
- Leonard Hofstadter: Oh my God! This is my entire childhood.
- Sheldon Cooper: Leonard, Leonard, you're tainting my data.
- Leonard Hofstadter: It's like word for word.
- Leonard Hofstadter: Tell me the truth, mother. Was my whole childhood just one big experiment?
- Dr. Beverly Hofstadter: Of course not, dear. It was thousands of small experiments
- Penny Hofstadter: Hi, can I help you?
- Kwame: Actually, I'm looking for the bathroom.
- Penny Hofstadter: Ah yes, it's right next to the laxative booth. Clever, right?