- Polly: My only sexual partner involves batteries and last night, they ran out. I had to steal some from the smoke detector just to pop one off.
- Desna Simms: That is tragic.
- Jen Husser: Y'all don't know what it's like to lose baby weight.
- Desna Simms: Are you still on that? Girl, your baby is 4.
- Jen Husser: That's hurtful.
- Uncle Daddy: [to Desna] I guess I could get you a layaway plan. Your people seem to love those.
- Desna Simms: You mean nail technicians?
- Uncle Daddy: Huh, girl. You make me laugh.