- Van Wayne: I know you can hear me, Dork Knight. You better bring your checkbook and a prepared statement I can turn in to Geico.
- Ron: Those pecs aren't real.
- Teddy: You're wearing something under the suit.
- Ron: Mm-hmm.
- Van Wayne: Well, if you must know, follow me.
- [Van opens up his shirt revealing a Robin costume]
- Ron: Oh my, God. You're Robin.
- Van Wayne: Yes. No. Well, not yet. Maybe. Just - okay, let me ask you something. What is the best part about being a superhero?
- Ron: Protecting those who can't protect themselves.
- Van Wayne: No. It's about being famous and wearing cool-ass costumes. That's why I had this made by my rubbersmith.
- Ron: I had no idea you were a closet superhero fan. Who's your top ten?
- Teddy: This is more than that. You actually think Batman is going to look at you, a middle-aged man who pulled his back last week sneezing, and say, "Hey, there's my new Boy Wonder" ?
- Van Wayne: This guy gets it! Yes. And then once we have a good working relationship - I don't know - I'm thinking I might bring up the Maybach thing.
- Ron: Quick question.
- Van Wayne: Yeah?
- Ron: You are aware that two Robins have supposedly died on the job?
- Van Wayne: Hm, high turnover. I'm in.
- Jackie: What are you doing?
- Emily Locke: I'm trying to backwards hug you.
- Jackie: If I don't want your front hugs, what makes you think I want your back ones?