The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Application Deterioration (2016)
Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper
Photos
Quotes
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Sheldon Cooper : The revisions I made start on page four.
Penny Hofstadter : Wow, that is a lot of "whereupons".
Amy Farrah Fowler : You should see the Valentine's Day card he gave me.
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Sheldon Cooper : Any contract I sign is enforced by my own personal code of ethics.
Amy Farrah Fowler : And his obsessive-compulsive disorder.
Sheldon Cooper : Yeah, that too. And scoot over; part of your shadow's on my spot.
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Howard Wolowitz : This contract looks good to me.
Sheldon Cooper : I'll say it looks good. It's in my proprietary font, Shelvetica.
Leonard Hofstadter : I want to say something obnoxious, but it is easy on the eyes.
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Sheldon Cooper : Sounds like a, uh, contract might be in order.
Leonard Hofstadter : Sure; we could write something up.
Sheldon Cooper : But which one of us should be the party who...
Howard Wolowitz : You can do it, Sheldon.
Sheldon Cooper : So stipulated!
Leonard Hofstadter : Once I found a stash of contracts under his bed. It was weird.
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[first lines]
Howard Wolowitz : OK, I gotta ask: why are you wearing a bow tie?
Sheldon Cooper : I've never applied for a patent before; I wanted to make a good impression.
Howard Wolowitz : The impression that your first name is Pee-wee?
[Leonard laughs]
Sheldon Cooper : Yeah, well, you're an engineer. End of joke. Burn.
Tim : Come on in, fellows.
Howard Wolowitz : See, he's not wearing a tie.
Leonard Hofstadter : Oh, he's a patent attorney; maybe his tie is pending.
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Penny Hofstadter : Sheldon, did you draw up the contract?
Sheldon Cooper : You bet I did.
Penny Hofstadter : [to Amy] Ooh. You're going to make out so hard tonight.
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Sheldon Cooper : Hey, Leonard.
Leonard Hofstadter : What?
Sheldon Cooper : If she doesn't think that we should apply for this patent, she's being "patently" absurd.
Leonard Hofstadter : Good one.
Sheldon Cooper : OK, you got it. See, I was afraid it was a thinker.
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Sheldon Cooper : I just hope that this scholarship can rescue your child from the subpar education and menial life of an engineer.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Sheldon!
Sheldon Cooper : What? I didn't sign it yet.
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Sheldon Cooper : Excuse me! I've been drafting contracts since kindergarten. Didn't need a lawyer to get me out of finger painting; don't need one now.