The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Perspiration Implementation (2015)
Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper
Photos
Quotes
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Leonard Hofstadter : Barry Kripke started a fencing club.
Sheldon Cooper : Interesting. Sword fighting does hold a certain elegant appeal. And I would imagine it meets many of our personal criteria for a sport.
Leonard Hofstadter : It's indoors, so no sunscreen.
Sheldon Cooper : No throwing, no catching, no running.
Leonard Hofstadter : No gym shorts that can be yanked down.
Sheldon Cooper : Or worse, up.
Leonard Hofstadter : Preach.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Hey, ready for lunch?
Howard Wolowitz : Oh, one sec.
Sheldon Cooper : Is that the prototype drive system for the high-G rover?
Howard Wolowitz : No, Bernadette got me a Fitbit so she can track how much I'm exercising.
Leonard Hofstadter : That'll teach her to care about your health.
Howard Wolowitz : Yeah, I can't wait to see the look on her face when I die young.
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Sheldon Cooper : Excuse me, Barry?
Barry Kripke : Yes?
Sheldon Cooper : When can I stab one of my friends?
Barry Kripke : In fencing, we don't call it a stab. We call it a touch.
Sheldon Cooper : Uh, yes, I'm aware. But if I say I want to touch one of my friends, I'll get called into Human Resources.
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Leonard Hofstadter : I'm surprised you wanted to go to a sports bar, Sheldon.
Sheldon Cooper : Look at this blister. Like it or not, we're athletes now.
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Sheldon Cooper : I smell funny. I taste salty.
Leonard Hofstadter : You're just sweaty from exercise.
Sheldon Cooper : And kind of delicious. I wonder how many licks it would take to get to the center of me.
Leonard Hofstadter : I know it only takes one doctor's finger.
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Sheldon Cooper : According to a recent study, simply thinking about exercise, even while sitting still, can have physical benefits. For all you know, I could be exercising right now.
Raj Koothrappali : Are you?
Sheldon Cooper : Nah, I'll do it tomorrow.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Look at all these activities the university has. Rock climbing club, archery, flag football.
Sheldon Cooper : Had me at flag, lost me at football.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Listen, I should warn you that maybe asking Amy out isn't a good idea.
Sheldon Cooper : Barry, a word?
Leonard Hofstadter : And now the crazy version of what I just said.
Sheldon Cooper : If you intend to pursue Amy, you leave me with no choice but to put a stop to it.
Barry Kripke : And how are you gonna do that?
Sheldon Cooper : By challenging you to a duel.
Barry Kripke : You've had one lesson. I'll destroy you.
Sheldon Cooper : That is why the duel will take place at high noon, three years from today. If you're worth your salt as an instructor, I should be ready by then. Yeah, and be warned. I'm going to touch you all over.
Leonard Hofstadter : Wow, that was crazier than I thought.
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Sheldon Cooper : Excuse me. I'm recovering from a recent breakup, and I'm told asking out another woman might make me feel better. And as Ash Ketchum said to Pikachu, "I choose you."
Natalie : What?
Sheldon Cooper : It's a Pokemon reference.
Natalie : I don't know what that means.
Sheldon Cooper : Well, we gave it a shot.
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Sheldon Cooper : You know, when my honor is insulted, and I need to challenge someone to a duel by slapping them across the face with my glove.
Leonard Hofstadter : When was your honor insulted?
Sheldon Cooper : My last physical.
Leonard Hofstadter : Again, that doctor didn't insult your honor, he just checked your prostate.