Klaus (2019)
Norm MacDonald: Mogens
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Quotes
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[Jesper approaches a wooden hut beside a docked boat. A scruffy, middle-aged man rests inside the hut. Jesper huffs, then clears his throat]
Mogens : You go back to the intersection, you make a left at the dead tree. You're welcome.
Jesper : What? No. I'm not lost.
Mogens : Trust me, you are.
[Jesper laughs sarcastically]
Jesper : Funny. Say, nice boat! Any chance you might actually get on it today?
[Mogens lifts his hat]
Mogens : What was that?
Jesper : New postman. Smeerensburg. Which is on an island, which is surrounded by water, which I need a boat to get to, which you have. Are we starting to connect the dots?
[Mogens gives Jesper a jaded smile]
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Mogens : Ah, young love - takes me back, you know. The intense looks, the palpitation of the heart... the whimpering and the soiling of the pants? No - I can't relate to so much.
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Postmaster General : Anchors aweigh captain, we're sailing off at once.
Mogens : [looking at Jesper] Well, that's a first.
Postmaster General : I beg your pardon?
Mogens : Never saw a postman looking more miserable leaving than on the day they came in... Oh well, best leave it alone I say. I'm sure it's nothing that could eventually fester and become a source of regret.
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Mogens : [mocking Jesper's failure to post letters] Is this a bad time? I can see you're pretty swamped!
Jesper : [exhausted] Don't... you... have... a job... or something?
Mogens : Why, sure I do! I'm here to pick up all the outgoing mail! So - where is it? Now, you're gonna have to help me with the heavier bags. Bad back, don't you know.
Jesper : Man, I hate you.
Mogens : I know.