Pete Winning and the Pirates: The Motion Picture (2015) User Reviews

Bad schlock

[Snootz · 3/10 · 18 July 2018]

I like schlock as much as the next guy. Love a good, humorous schlock movie. But there is a certain level of expectation-- which this film falls short of in all counts.

From the squeaky-voice lead character to the incoherent plot to ridiculous script-- this takes all the fun out of schlock. The lines are terrible (not funny terrible, just terrible), and it totally lacks in all concept of common sense. Okay, you're out to sea, boarded by "bad guys" from another ship, whom you overcome after they've put holes in your boat. So what do you do... take their ship right? No, you risk losing all the crew by swimming to shore in shark-infested waters. And how did they overcome the bad guys? Because despite having multi-fire laser pistols, it seems the only thing the bad guys can hit is the broadside of a boat! Seriously?

This is one of the worst movies I've seen outside of something with "cheerleader", "barbarian" or "graveyard" in the title. I have no idea how it won awards in anything outside of Raspberries. Honestly... has the film-viewing community been totally brainwashed by Transformer movies?

Bad writing, bad directing, terrible acting. Just bad. Sure-fire candidate as fodder for Mystery Science Theater.

Squeaky vouces, bad acting, not good enough for camp or schlock

[bobkuhl · 1/10 · 6 February 2020]

Oh my gosh, Where do you start. First, who did The Dubbing with the squeaky voices? This guy actually previously starred in a series? The other reviewers must have really really loved the series because they're overlooking so much that's bad about this movie to reminisce and enjoy this one. Second, the editing sucks. As if the jokes weren't bad enough and lines horribly acted, there's so many extra millisecond gaps, youre just waiting for the groans. Comedy is timing, and this aint it. If you want to see good funny camp on a low-budget then watch that Australian comedy about turkey zombies or whatever, it's much more fun. Unless you absolutely loved the original Pete winning and are willing to consume a horrible movie to reminisce, I suggest you skip this one.