Master of None (TV Series)

Nashville (2015)

Aziz Ansari: Dev

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dev : I feel like once you get to our age, that window to do big moves like that starts to close. And it doesn't even close slowly. You just look up, and it's closed.

  Rachel : At some point, I would love to do something crazy, like quit my job, change my hair, move to Tokyo, but I'll probably just pull a Jennifer and wake up with a kid in my lap and be like, "Shit, forgot to do it." Yeah.

  Dev : Why Tokyo?

  Rachel : I've always wanted to go. And I was really into Japanese culture and stuff when I was in high school.

  Dev : Well, you could always pull the Eat, Pray, Love move. You know, the window opens back up again when you turn 50 and you realize you fucked up your life. So you can just travel then.

  Rachel : Very depressing.

• Dev : Um I'm sorry I didn't remember you were from Texas. Uh, I was definitely hammered that night, so please just give me a pass on the basis of that.

  Rachel : Oh, of course. I barely remember anything from that night, except for that you're from South Carolina, you have a younger brother, your dad's a doctor, and you went to a public high school for students, uh, gifted in math and science.

  Dev : Yeah. But... don't you feel like those are just assumptions you can make about any Indian person?

• [first lines] 

  Arnold : Dude, these bathrooms are so amazing. I love when restaurants splurge on those premium hand dryers. I feel like I'm drying my hands in the future.

  Dev : Oh, and that fancy soap? - Mm. - My hands smell like geraniums. It's amazing. Hey, so I was thinking about this. You know in that 8 Mile song, Eminem raps, There is no movie. There's no Mekhi Phifer. But it is a movie. And Mekhi Phifer's there. He's there.

  Arnold : Uh-uh. That's where you're wrong. He's writing it from the perspective of Eminem in real life.

  Dev : No, no, no. He says, "Mom's spaghetti." That's in the movie. He has a spaghetti stain on his shirt before the battle at The Shelter. He's B-Rabbit.

  Arnold : No, you're just being ignorant now. In the first verse, he's rapping as the character B-Rabbit, and there is a movie I'll grant you that.

  Dev : Thank yer.

  Arnold : But in the second verse, the perspective switches to that of Eminem, the real-life rapping actor. So, therefore, the lyrics stand. There *is* no movie. There *is* no Mekhi Phifer.

  Dev : [sighs]  All right. Point taken.

• Dev : [looking it up]  Honky-tonk means white people hitting it hard? As a minority, I'll admit I'm a little bit nervous about a situation where a large group of white people are hitting it hard, but I'll take my chances.

  Rachel : All right, honky, let's go tonk.

• [last lines] 

  Rachel : [getting out of taxi]  Thank you so much. I had a really wonderful time.

  Dev : Yeah, I did too. This may sound crazy 'cause I know we've been hanging out nonstop for the past 24 hours. Plus those seven bonus angry hours. But uh, are you hungry? You want to get some food?

  Rachel : Yeah, I could go get some food. But I'm really picky about my condiments. Wait. You don't happen to have three large bottles of Tickler's white barbecue sauce, do you?

  Dev : I did, but I drank all three bottles on the plane when you went to the bathroom.

  Rachel : Oh, that's too bad. Well, it was really nice seeing you. Bye.

  Dev : Bye. Wait, I have some! I'm coming. I'm coming. I'm coming. I'm coming...

  Rachel : [laughs] 

  Dev : So, should we follow around some full-bodied people, find a good place to eat?

  Rachel : [laughs] 

  [slow Country music] 

• Rachel : A lot of people get me mixed up for Danny Glover all the time.

  Dev : He's like the celebrity you get the most?

  Rachel : Oh, yeah, for sure. One time, I met Mel Gibson. He was very confused.