Bob's Burgers (TV Series)

Tina and the Real Ghost (2014)

Kristen Schaal: Louise Belcher

Quotes 

• Louise Belcher : Plus, we don't know if that's water or urine you're lying in.

  Tina Belcher : It's water. No, pee.

• Louise Belcher : So, Jeff, how's your first day at school going? Which is worse: purgatory or the smell in Tina's locker?

  Tina Belcher : It doesn't smell anymore, Louise. I got rid of the yogurt.

• Tina Belcher : I was thinking of showing Jeff the butterflies at the science center. You guys don't want to come along, do you? Probably not. Great. Bye.

  [leaves] 

  Louise Belcher : Jeff, you have my sister home by 11:00!

  Gene Belcher : Wait, make that 9:00\8:00 central! Jeff and I are gonna watch "Kitchen Nightmares." That's gonna be our thing!

• Bob Belcher : [after Tina announces that she's dating Jeff]  Did you just say you two were dating?

  Louise Belcher : Dad, you're not gonna like every guy she brings home.

• Gene Belcher : Wait, so let me get this straight. His name's not Jeff, but he's real.

  Louise Belcher : No, Gene, there is no Jeff! I just thought it would be funny. I didn't think Tina would fall in love with him and I definitely didn't think Tammy was gonna pull the same crap as me but better with that mirror thing. And now I'm gonna go tell Tina and say I'm sorry, and we're all gonna laugh about this someday, right, guys?

  Linda Belcher : I don't think that's such a good idea.

  Bob Belcher : Lin, why is that not such a good idea?

  Linda Belcher : 'Cause Tina's already feeling heartbroken right now. If we tell her the truth, she's gonna feel heartbroken and dumb.

  Gene Belcher : She got catfished by a box!

  Louise Belcher : So... I'm not telling Tina?

  Linda Belcher : You'll see. You'll all go trick-or-treating tomorrow. She'll be fine. She'll be back to her normal, teeny Tina. She just needs nougat.

• Jimmy Pesto, Jr. : [to Tina, annoyed]  I'll see you if I see you!

  Louise Belcher : [to Tina]  Man, he was all over you!