- Homer Simpson: Okay, this crowd is about to experience the special magic of the cover band; the thrill of live music without the fear of hearing anything new.
- Homer Simpson: And that's the terrifying tale of how the Quebec Nordiques became...
- [menacing voice]
- Homer Simpson: ...the Colorado Avalanche.
- Homer Simpson: I'm not jealous, I'm envious. Jealousy is when you worry someone will take what you have. Envy is wanting what someone else has. What I feel is envy.
- Lisa Simpson: [Checking into a dictionary] Wow, he's right.
- Lisa Simpson: [At the outlet stores] Look at all these monstrosities.
- Homer Simpson: Honey, what did I tell you about worshiping our corporate overlords?
- Homer Simpson: Apu leaving is the best thing that ever happened to this band, we're gonna be like Genesis after Peter Gabriel left.
- Bart Simpson: You mean more popular, but not as good?
- Homer Simpson: Phil Collins-era Genesis is not as good, huh? "No Reply at All," "Land of Confusion," "Throwing it All Away," "Illegal Alien," "I Can't Dance," and I'm sure I don't need to mention "Invisible Touch"! Hmph!