The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Colonization Application (2015)
Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper
Photos
Quotes
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Sheldon Cooper : I'm exceedingly smart. I graduated college at fourteen. While my brother was getting an STD, I was getting a Ph.D. Penicillin can't take this away.
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Amy Farrah Fowler : Getting a joint pet is a big step in our relationship.
Sheldon Cooper : It's true. It means we love each other so much we have enough left over for an eight ounce reptile.
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Amy Farrah Fowler : Let's pick a turtle. How about that one, on the log?
Sheldon Cooper : I don't know. He looks like a jerk. How about this one?
Amy Farrah Fowler : That one? He's hardly moving, he looks half dead.
Sheldon Cooper : I know. I like him too.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Why a turtle?
Sheldon Cooper : After much deliberation, we've determined that a turtle is the ideal pet. They don't shed fur. They don't make noise.
Amy Farrah Fowler : For Halloween, we can dress him as a cobble stone.
Sheldon Cooper : And, if he ever goes beserk, I know I can out run him. Coincidentally that's also why I chose you as a roommate.
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Sheldon Cooper : During the seven month trip to Mars, I can keep up morale with my wacky sense of humor. Leonard, could you check to see if there is still peanut brittle in that can?
Leonard Hofstadter : You mean this suspicious looking can over here?
Sheldon Cooper : Yes. Open it and check.
[Leonard opens can]
Leonard Hofstadter : I don't get it. There actually is peanut brittle in here.
[Sheldon throws a pie in Leonard's face]
Leonard Hofstadter : Please go to Mars.
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Sheldon Cooper : I can't believe you almost let me bring a wild animal into my house.
Amy Farrah Fowler : No one told you to stick your finger in the turtle's face.
Sheldon Cooper : I was playing got your nose. That's how you get kids to like you.
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Sheldon Cooper : We could be the first to say, "Good Lord, what on Mars are you talking about?"
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Amy Farrah Fowler : Let's say it together.
Amy Farrah Fowler , Sheldon Cooper : We're getting a turtle!
Penny : See, this is why I've been saying we should keep champagne on ice.
Sheldon Cooper : Sarcasm?
Amy Farrah Fowler : Yes.
Sheldon Cooper : That was tricky because when it comes to alcohol, she generally means business.
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Sheldon Cooper : Amy, I've already had one new hole torn in my body today. I don't need another one.
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Sheldon Cooper : I know that life on Mars will be difficult. But life here on Earth is no picnic. Also, picnics are no picnic.
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Sheldon Cooper : In fact, animals don't trust me because I smell like nothing.