The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Friendship Turbulence (2014)
Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper
Photos
Quotes
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Penny : [Car making noises] Uh, that doesn't sound good.
Sheldon Cooper : Remember the old days when I used to point out that your check engine light was on?
Penny : Yes.
Sheldon Cooper : Well, we're ready to stroll down memory lane. Penny your check engine light is on.
Penny : Yes, I know it's on Sheldon. Oh, no, no, no, no. I can't afford this right now.
Sheldon Cooper : [car stops] Maybe it's just something minor. Oh good news. The light just went out.
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Sheldon Cooper : Leonard, could you wrap it up? We're waiting for you.
Penny : I'm sorry, is the fact that my life's falling apart interrupting your board game?
Sheldon Cooper : It is.
[to Howard]
Sheldon Cooper : See, I told you she would understand.
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Sheldon Cooper : Ten years ago upon first seeing me your husband claimed that I looked like C-3PO and Pee Wee Herman. And he called me C-3-PeeWee Herman.
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Howard Wolowitz : Back in the car. I'm an astronaut and you know it. You just don't like admitting it because you're jealous.
Sheldon Cooper : Well, truth be told, as a child I did dream of going into space. Those astronauts were my heroes, and when you got to go it was hard for me.
Howard Wolowitz : Thank you.
Sheldon Cooper : Because it made me realize they'll just send anyone up there.
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Sheldon Cooper : I'm sorry for every mean thing I ever said or did to you.
Howard Wolowitz : I'm sorry too. It's all my fault.
Sheldon Cooper : If you weren't my friend there'd be a hole in my life.
Howard Wolowitz : Thank you.
Sheldon Cooper : Kind of like when Firefly was cancelled. But not as big.
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Penny : Well, I'll have you guys know that I turned down a part in a movie last week.
Leonard Hofstadter : Why would you do that?
Penny : Because it was crap. It was a sequel to that awful killer gorilla movie.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Serial Ape-ist? I thought you died in that.
Sheldon Cooper : She does, 42 minutes in.
Raj Koothrappali : While showering topless, 16 minutes after a brief side butt during a pillow fight with her sorority sisters.
Sheldon Cooper : I have an eidetic memory. I don't know what his problem is.
Penny : Okay, well, there are no shower scenes in this one. They just try to clone me from my corpse, but my DNA gets mixed with the ape's DNA and I end up running around with giant gorilla hands and feet.
Sheldon Cooper : Am I missing something, or isn't that the part she was born to play?
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Sheldon Cooper : [On the plane, on his shoulder]
[Tap, tap, tap]
Sheldon Cooper : Howard?
[Tap, tap, tap]
Sheldon Cooper : Howard?
[Tap, tap, tap]
Sheldon Cooper : Howard?
Howard Wolowitz : What now?
Sheldon Cooper : I have to go to the bathroom.
Howard Wolowitz : You just went to the bathroom.
Sheldon Cooper : I didn't use it because it didn't seem safe. Despite all the emails, the toilet didn't have a seat belt.
Howard Wolowitz : Well, it still doesn't.
Sheldon Cooper : I realize that, but safety concerns went out the window two apple juices ago.
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Raj Koothrappali : Can we please talk about something other than my depressing love life.
Sheldon Cooper : How about Penny's depressing acting career?
Leonard Hofstadter : Hey. I mean, it's been a little tough, but Penny's following her dreams and in my book that's not depressing.
Penny : Thank you.
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Howard Wolowitz : Hey, I work at the same university you do.
Sheldon Cooper : Yes, and Hawkeye's in the Avengers, but no one ever says, "Help, Hawkeye."
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Leonard Hofstadter : Are we playing individuals or teams?
Raj Koothrappali : Teams are fun.
Sheldon Cooper : Oh, in that case I'd like to be partnered with my good friend Howard.
Raj Koothrappali : But I'm always on Howard's team! We're best friends. The kind that finish each other's...
Howard Wolowitz : We don't really do that.
Raj Koothrappali : [Interrupting] ... do that! See?