- Harvey Specter: So he's seen you naked?
- Jessica Pearson: That's usually how these things work. Are you picturing me naked right now?
- Harvey Specter: Maybe. Yes.
- Jessica Pearson: Go wash your hands. And don't spend too much time in that bathroom.
- Walter Gillis: You should know I'm only doing this as a courtesy to Jonathan Sidwell, but I'll tell you right now, the answer is no.
- Mike Ross: Good.
- Walter Gillis: Why good?
- Mike Ross: Because a yes is always so much better when it starts as a no.
- Harvey Specter: Logan, let me give you the ABCs of me. I don't take meetings. I set them. And my respect isn't demanded. It's earned.
- Logan Sanders: That's only two things. What's "C?"
- Harvey Specter: "C" is for people who show me they know "A" and "B."
- Logan Sanders: Well, since we're quoting Jerry Maguire, all I want is for you to show me the money.
- Donna Paulsen: I used mousse in high school. It was the '90s.
- Rachel Zane: Was it?
- Donna Paulsen: I heard that.
- Harvey Specter: A man like Walter Gillis isn't gonna listen to a guy like you offering to save him with sunshine and rainbows.
- Mike Ross: That's exactly what you said to me before I got him to sell me his distribution centers.
- Harvey Specter: Congratulations. You got to walk his dog. That doesn't mean he's gonna let you marry his daughter.
- Harvey Specter: I don't want to talk about it.
- Donna Paulsen: You mean about how everything I said would happen happened, and now you realize I was right the whole time?
- Harvey Specter: No one likes a gloater, Donna.
- Donna Paulsen: Well, then I guess the Harvey Specter University of gloating is gonna have to shut down.
- Harvey Specter: I can still give lectures on the weekend. You want to hear it? You were right.
- Katrina Bennett: Louis, guess who stopped by yesterday for an impromptu meeting with Jessica and Harvey.
- Louis Litt: Please tell me it was Dick Cheney.
- Katrina Bennett: Why would you want it to be Dick Cheney?
- Louis Litt: Why wouldn't I want it to be Iron Dick? Holy shit, I think I know who you were talking about.
- Katrina Bennett: I think you do, too.
- Louis Litt: Is it a certain S.E.C. beast whose name happens to rhyme with schmeff schmalone?
- Katrina Bennett: Schmess it is, and schmess it does.
- Louis Litt: Well, schmuck me.
- Jessica Pearson: You are not my hair-gelled partner in crime.
- Rachel Zane: I haven't used hair gel since ninth grade.
- [Jessica gives her a look]
- Rachel Zane: I was trying to avoid the frizzy look.
- Mike Ross: That's bullshit. This deal is solid.
- Jonathan Sidwell: No, what's bullshit is you've been here for three months. All you've done is hit singles, and I need a goddamn home run.
- Jessica Pearson: Where is he?
- Rachel Zane: Uh, Donna said that he had a morning meeting outside of the office.
- Rachel Zane: And where is Donna?
- Donna Paulsen: Right here. I prefer to appear at the exact moment I'm needed.
- Jessica Pearson: I wish I could say the same for Harvey.
- Katrina Bennett: I found out the name of the man Woodall's sending after us: Jeff Malone.
- Louis Litt: Jeff Malone is a beast.
- Katrina Bennett: Well, the only way to beat a beast is with a bigger beast.
- Louis Litt: I need to get in there before everyone else and let Harvey and Jessica know that I had the foresight to look for it, the cunning to find it, and the balls to stop it.
- Katrina Bennett: Then you take on Malone.
- Louis Litt: Next stop: Name partner.
- Katrina Bennett: Pearson Specter... Litt.
- Louis Litt: Okay, you know what? Just... Let's not count our chickens before they hatch -- but just for shits and giggles, say it one more time. Leave out Specter.
- Jeff Malone: What are you so afraid of?
- Jessica Pearson: Do I have to draw you a picture? I'm not the one that made up the saying "You don't shit where you eat."
- Jeff Malone: Am I the shit or the food in this little painting of yours?
- Harvey Specter: [Harvey finds Mike waiting in his office] Look what the cat dragged in -- and you're wearing a vest.
- Mike Ross: Here it comes.
- Harvey Specter: Here what comes? Mazel tov. Congratulations on your special day.
- Mike Ross: That's a good one.
- Donna Paulsen: Harvey, leave him alone. He looks better than you do.
- Mike Ross: Thank you, Donna.
- Donna Paulsen: You're welcome. Oh, and Mr. Peanut called, and he said he'd be happy to lend you his top hat.
- Mike Ross: Are you two finished?
- Donna Paulsen: This is about you not letting Mike call the shots.
- Harvey Specter: I let him call the shots, all he's gonna do is shoot himself in the foot.
- Harvey Specter: [ending his talk with Donna] . Thanks, Mom, but I think I'm gonna keep playing ball in the house.
- Harvey Specter: Do I need to give you a tutorial on the procedure? You start by buying shares.
- Mike Ross: I know what the procedure is, Harvey.
- Harvey Specter: Well how many shares have you bought?
- Mike Ross: None.
- Harvey Specter: This phrase, "I know what the procedure is," I don't think it means what you think it means.
- Mike Ross: Well, as "inconceivable" as it might be to you, Harvey, I'm actually not going in hostile.