- Selina Meyer: So what, I had a horse as a kid, who didn't?
- Gary Walsh: Hmmm...
- Selina Meyer: I mean, have a pet, is what I meant.
- Selina Meyer: You want me to be some sorta party puppet? You can stick your hand up my ass and work my mouth?
- Andrew Doyle: Yes please!
- Selina Meyer: [to her staff] And what were you bobbleheads doing while I was just getting earf... ked by father time?
- Kent Davison: Uh, ma'am, I spoke to Senator Doyle earlier, and he offered his input on configuration of guests.
- Selina Meyer: Doyle? You're kidding me. I'd rather get advice from a fuckin' ouija board.
- Sue Wilson: [a group of elderly people are standing in a group]
- [to Kent]
- Sue Wilson: Sir, this is your beauty pageant of the nearly dead.