The Newsroom (TV Series)

Boston (2014)

Thomas Sadoski: Don Keefer

Quotes 

• Judge : [Don urgently wants to get out of jury duty; addresses the judge, who is not too impressed]  All these people have someplace else to be. I'm sure your network can do the news without you.

  Don Keefer : You're probably right but I'd hate for my boss to find that out.

  Judge : [Still not impressed]  Take your seat.

  Don Keefer : Ah.

  [Turns to one of the lawyers] 

  Don Keefer : Look, you don't want leaders on the jury, right? Anyone who can take charge during deliberations? I run a news broadcast five nights a week with a staff of sixty, and I bend them to my will...

  [turns to the other lawyer] 

  Don Keefer : ... plus, I'm currently the defendant in two lawsuits being brought by the same person, so... even though I bought your client's bagel slicer at 3 a.m., and it nearly took my fingers off, there is simply no way in *hell* that I'm finding for the plaintiff...

  [pulls breath to continue] 

  Judge : Get out of here!

  Don Keefer : Thank you!

• Reese Lansing : I know everyone on this floor thinks I'm an asshole. But, I run a good company. And that's all I've ever wanted to do. Run a good company that makes good products. And we may have a political difference on this, but I take a lot of pride in being a job creator.

  Sloan Sabbith : Okay.

  Reese Lansing : You really want to argue the indisputable fact that I cut paychecks to 141,000 people?

  Sloan Sabbith : Our difference of opinion isn't political; it's religious. I'm an economist and in my church it's your customers who are the job creators. And no one here thinks you're an asshole.

  Reese Lansing : Really?

  Don Keefer : [Just entering the room]  I do.

• Sloan Sabbith : I like puzzles.

  Don Keefer : No. you don't.

  Sloan Sabbith : I *love* puzzles.

  Don Keefer : You literally talk back to the New York Times crossword. You yell at it.

  Sloan Sabbith : [Giving him a knowing look]  Can I tell you something about the New York Times crossword? Very often they put the wrong number of boxes in to house the correct word.

  Don Keefer : [Smiling indulgently]  Yeah.

• Sloan Sabbith : [Referring to a woman she had breakfast with]  She tried to give me a message in a bottle.

  Don Keefer : What was it?

  Sloan Sabbith : Merrill's media buyer is gonna lose his job because he's been having an affair with his 24 year old assistant who used to be a circus performer.

  Don Keefer : [Faraway look in his eyes]  Ahhhh...

  [Sloane looks at him] 

  Don Keefer : That was an involuntary response you'd get from any man who pictures a circus girl...