Hot in Cleveland (TV Series)

Dr. Who? (2014)

Jane Leeves: Joy Scroggs

Photos 

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  Joy Scroggs : [plumping a cushion]  Simon is going to be here any minute, and these pillows are flat!

  Elka Ostrovsky : Well, if he's turned off by flat things...

  Melanie Moretti : [warningly]  Elka, not today. She's very nervous. Joy, honey, you have got to calm down.

  Joy Scroggs : I can't. I'm nervous enough that Simon's coming to see me, but he's also meeting his son and his grandson for the first time. I know it's silly of me to hope, but what if it all works out? We could be a real family. Maybe even a perfect family.

  Melanie Moretti : Well, no family is perfect.

  Joy Scroggs : We'll be. Caroling on Christmas Eve in our matching sweaters. People will look at us and say, "Why can't we be happy like them?" And we'll smile as the spirit of Christmas is replaced by envy in their hearts.

  Elka Ostrovsky : And I thought Melanie was the one with the brain tumor.

• Owen : You seem like a decent guy now, but it's hard to get over all those awful things you've done.

  Simon : Abandoning your mother.

  Owen : Yeah. And the drug dealing. And the arson.

  Simon : What! I never did those things!

  Joy Scroggs : When I first met Owen, I may have told him a few white lies, so he'd hate you as much as I did. Plus, I'd just shot him, and I wanted him to be on *my* side.

  Simon : You *shot* him?

  Owen : You lied to me!

  Joy Scroggs : Hah, look at us. Oh, we may have just met, but we already have a lot of baggage. We *are* a real family.

• [last lines] 

  Simon : You know, I never thought I'd say this, but... d'you want to go to bed, grandma?

  Joy Scroggs : I sure would, grandpa.

  Simon : Worst dirty talk ever.

  Joy Scroggs : Oh, shut up and kiss me.