- Chloe: [taking taste test, after mistaking the white powder on the table for something else] Oh, I guess it's alwsays going to be flour with you.
- Chloe: [at tenant's meeting] Where's the new family?
- [mother and son raise their hands]
- Chloe: Hi there, I'm Chloe. I live in Apartment 23.
- [to the boy:]
- Chloe: How old are you, sixteen, seventeen?
- Anthony Pizzoli: [eagerly at sexy chick] Seventeen and a half.
- Chloe: Okay, well, uhm... According to Megan's Law, I'm required to tell all families with a minor that I live within a 500 ft. radius, and I'm a registered sex offender.
- [June is shocked, everybody else gapes at her as well]
- Anthony Pizzoli: [obviously impressed] So, I'm Tony P. but my friends call me Nut-Nut.
- Mrs. Pizzoli: Anthony, no!
- [like she's holding a dog back on a leash, as she pulls him down back on his chair, Chloe traipses out, with June still taken aback]
- June Colburn: [arriving home, interrupting murmuring love-play] I'm going to bed. Could you at least hold off on the sex noises until I get my earplugs in?
- Chloe: [coming up for air from lover's embrace] Oh! You can't go in your room!
- James Van Der Beek: [obviously having come from June's room, with classy dark-haired lady friend in tow] No, it's all good. We're done.
- June Colburn: What? In my room?
- James Van Der Beek: Good night out.
- [to June:]
- James Van Der Beek: Oh, FYI, don't wear your pyjama pants for a while.
- June Colburn: [Chloe has jumped onto the back of yet another stranger's bicycle, and they're riding off] At least put on a helmet!
- Chloe: [shouting back] He will!
- Luther Wilson: [as always, coming between James and his dates] Those earrings are terrible.
- [annoying James and his blond date]
- Luther Wilson: Don't look at me, I didn't make them.
- James Van Der Beek: Okay, Chloe, enough of this nonsense. Luther is not working out as my wing-man.
- Luther Wilson: [flashback, approaching ripe-for-the-plucking young lady at bar on James' behalf] Hey, girl.
- [sidling up]
- Luther Wilson: You like my friend over there? James Van Der Beek.
- [amicably, campy]
- Luther Wilson: He likes you too.
- [harsh:]
- Luther Wilson: But I don't. He is a guest judge on Project Runway in the morning.
- [fake grin, for James' sake]
- Luther Wilson: He needs his beauty sleep, or his face will be big as a plate.
- [fooled James beams from across room]
- Luther Wilson: So get your purse,
- [hands it to her]
- Luther Wilson: and click-clack on out of here.
- [she is reluctant]
- Luther Wilson: Click-clack, click-clack!
- [she obeys reluctantly, James watching dumbfounded, Luther shrugging]