I've been playing Mortal Kombat games since the first one appeared in the arcade back in 1992. I can still remember how controversial these games were. The key selling point was the "violence", though this mostly just amounted to a bunch of red pixels.
Never was the series' blithe attitude toward joyful bloodshed more summed up than in the notorious "fatalities", allowing you to supposedly "kill" your opponent in ridiculously over-the-top ways, like ripping out their heart or decapitating them with a particularly hard punch.
Listening to the hoopla around video game violence that was such a moral panic back in the '90s, you would think that these games were nothing but fatalities. Of course, this isn't true. They had fantastic gameplay (especially the second game) and provided a bold and welcome counterpoint to the king of the fighting game hill, the Street Fighter games.
For all this, though, I was never much interested in the mythology of Mortal Kombat. I heard all that stuff about the Outworld and netherrealm or whatever and was never tempted to delve in. In fact, I think I preferred to be kept in the dark. The games have a dark and menacing aura about them, and some of the bossfights were actually scary, ie. The one against the giant, four-armed Mike Tyson lookalike Goro, or the towering, muscle bound, brutal warlord, Shao Kahn. I was actually scared facing these guys.
I think the less I knew about the games' back story, the better, because it made the chamber of horrors that were its bad guys more surprising each time I picked up a game.
For that reason, I had qualms about watching this most recent film spin-off of the Mortal Kombat video game franchise. I'd seen the first Mortal Kombat movie back in the '90s and it was actually pretty good, though I was only about ten when I saw it. "Mortal Kombat: Annihilation", on the other hand, flat-out sucked, and the recent reboot of the franchise into live action was also underwhelming.
I'll be honest, the only reason I watched "Mortal Kombat Legends: Snow Blind" was because I saw it was rated R18+ here in Australia, and for violence only. I had to see how much violence would lead to that hardest rating, and in a cartoon to boot.
And in regards to that violence, well, it does not disappoint. The opening scenes show a bunch of bad guys taking over a town by driving a bulldozer through it, which causes people's heads to burst like melons, and drives a spike through someone's chest, skewering their heart on the end of it like a shish kabob.
The army is led by evil Australian cyborg Kano, who declares himself king, and is later scene officiating a UFC-type fighting contest between two women. What is he, Dana White? Or maybe Joe Rogan? Anyway, when one girl beats the other, King Kano gives the victor the thumbs down like a Roman emperor, but the girl refuses to kill her opponent, so Kano kills them both, splattering their heads with his over-powered handgun.
Here's the thing about this violence: it's the only really adult material in the whole movie (or even the whole franchise!). That's what's always gotten me about Mortal Kombat. Take away the ridiculous ultraviolence and what do you have? Something not much more mature than a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.
"Mortal Kombat Legends: Snow Blind" doesn't even have any swearing. And you can forget about anything that even hints at sexuality. The Street Fighter animated movie - which is now, what, 25 years old? - at least had Chun Li in the shower.
I don't really mean this as a criticism. It's just something that's always stood out to me, the silliness of the costumes, the hammy dialogue, the cookie cutter plots... and the people being bisected down the middle in a spray of gore. It just doesn't go together.
I was telling you about the plot, right? Well after evil Kano becomes King, a brash young man arrives and fights off some bad guys, and also becomes convinced that he has met THE Sub-Zero, who is now an older, though no less musclebound, man, trying to make a peaceful living for himself as a farmer.
The young man is tricked by Shang Tsung and blinded, Sub-Zero offers to train him, we get some training sequences straight out of a Shaw Bros. Flick, Sub Zero mouths some hammy platitudes to inspire the young guy that sound like lines Yoda or Mr Miyagi forgot to say to Luke or Daniel, and then there's the final confrontation.
The basic plot is pretty familiar stuff, but I found it comfortable. The only surprises, as I've already mentioned, were the level of violence.
I still liked "Mortal Kombat Legends: Snow Blind" more than I expected I would. It's pretty entertaining from beginning to end, and I even appreciated the kung-fu movie clichés it used.
I mean, they're clichés for a reason. They're clichéd because they get the plot out of the way, and make room for some violence, and with all the blood and guts on screen, "Snow Blind" needed a pretty standard plot to make room for it.
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