Family Guy (TV Series)

Tea Peter (2012)

Mike Henry: Various

Quotes 

• Tea Party Rally Speaker : And now, it's my privilege to introduce another regular, blue-collar guy, our Quahog chapter spokesman, Joe Workingman!

  Carter Pewterschmidt : [with an obviously bad disguise]  Good afternoon, friends and socioeconomic equals! Is anyone else out there sick of government crap?

  Peter Griffin : [as the crowd cheers]  Oh, my God. It's like he's saying everything I'm listening to.

  Carter Pewterschmidt : That's right. The government wants to tell you what foods to eat.

  [boos] 

  Carter Pewterschmidt : And what church you can go to.

  [more boos] 

  Carter Pewterschmidt : And that you can't own a chimpanzee because you're not responsible enough.

  Peter Griffin : [more boos]  I would feed it!

  Carter Pewterschmidt : Also, the government wants to tell you how many children you can have.

  John Herbert : [mortified]  What? No!

  Carter Pewterschmidt : And the government wants to tell you you can't throw your old TVs into the river.

  Conseula : Then how I supposed to find TV?

  Carter Pewterschmidt : If you join the Tea Party, together, we can fix all that. But you probably don't wanna join the Tea Party because all you get are these stupid, awesome keychains!