- Officer Billy Pierce: I promised Stu I wouldn't go at it alone. Now, I wouldn't be breaking that promise If a certain someone decided to come with me, now, would I?
- Captain Dashell: That's true.
- Officer Billy Pierce: I'm talking about you, Captain. You... you should come with me.
- Captain Dashell: Oh, me?
- Officer Joe Stubeck: Do I know you from somewhere?
- Travis: Yeah, I'm the bassist for Plastic Organ.
- Officer Joe Stubeck: Oh.
- Travis: Uh, Six Inches Soft? Handicapped Stalls? Otis Gay and The Civil Rights? Nursery Crimes?
- Officer Joe Stubeck: Mm-Mm.
- Travis: Cancel The Pants?
- Officer Joe Stubeck: Definitely not.
- Travis: Those are just some of the bands I dabble in. You probably don't listen to that music anyways.
- Captain Dashell: [Watching a perp] Is that him?
- Officer Billy Pierce: Yeah, that's him. How the hell's he getting cell-phone coverage out here?
- Captain Dashell: Big S.O.B.
- Officer Billy Pierce: I wonder who his provider is.
- Captain Dashell: This guy's gonna fight. We got to hit him from behind.
- Officer Billy Pierce: Maybe I'm just not using my roaming feature right.
- Captain Dashell: Hey, Pierce, can we focus on the massive vampire we got to take down, please?