Archer is named in a paternity suit by a high priced hooker. Instead of taking out a condom during sex, he actually was eating a candy bar. Anyway, because Mallory couldn't bear having an illegitimate child connected to her, she orders Archer to exchange a liter of blood (How many gills in a liter, is the question) from someone else for the blood from his body. Everyone gets into the act, including throwing a baby shower for the little bumpkin. Archer must resort to some "Mission Impossible" action in order to do the switch. Just when we think Mallory has a heart, she returns to her usual dark side. There are some neat quips, designed to offend just about anyone: If I wanted to sit in one place and not go anywhere, I would have become a teacher."
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