- Jimmy: Look dude, I've had it all, all right: Skinny chicks, Tall chicks, Mini chicks, Chicks with Dicks. All right? Half machine/Half chick. But, when I wanna grease my piece; I go obese.
- Emily: You're right Jenny, I did unleash a monster.
- Jenny Kolinsky: Yeah, that's why it's called, "The Book of Pure Evil", you stupid skinny bitch!
- Todd Smith: It was the greatest dream I've ever had!
- Curtis Weaver: Wet dreams are the best.
- Todd Smith: Dude, I didn't say it was a wet dream.
- Curtis Weaver: It couldn't have been that good then.
- Todd Smith: Were you there?
- Curtis Weaver: I don't know, was I?
- Todd Smith: Why would you be in my sex dream, dude?
- Curtis Weaver: Maybe I dropped by to say hi, or to borrow something?
- Todd Smith: No, it was just Me and Jenny.
- Todd Smith: Curtis, I think we're screwed.
- Curtis Weaver: Well, if I get screwed dude, I'd want it to be with you.