The Hard Times of RJ Berger (TV Series)

Here's to You, Mrs. Robbins (2010)

Jareb Dauplaise: Miles Jenner

Quotes 

• [discussing a recent heated argument with Miles] 

  R.J. Berger : Alright yes, I was wrong in flaking on Raiders, but he's being an asshole, Lily. I mean, he's the one that told me I needed an expensive gift for Jenny. He's the reason why I got a job, and am busting my ass, trimming hedges, and mowing lawns in the first place.

  Lily Miran : Why didn't you tell me? I would've paid you to trim *my* hedges.

  [Miles walks up behind them] 

  Miles Jenner : He'd need a riding mower.

• [Miles stares a little too long at a girl bending over to get books out of her locker, and she gives him a dirty look as she walks away in a huff] 

  Miles Jenner : Whoah, I swear, Dude, chicks do not know how to take compliments these days.

  R.J. Berger : In theory, you could be a little more subtle with the eye-banging. I mean, if it creeps me out, imagine how she feels.

  Miles Jenner : Why? I mean, this is the only time in our lives that we are allowed to stare at teenage ass.

  [he points out a teacher who is making lewd, grunting sounds around some students] 

  Miles Jenner : When that guy does it, then it's creepy.

  R.J. Berger : Alright, that guy deserves to be on Dateline.

• R.J. Berger : Six months ago, Jenny had no idea who we were. We were like two random dudes. Now she invited one of us. On purpose, alright? Next time, maybe she'll invite both of us.

  Miles Jenner : Yeah, well, there won't be a next time if you give her that stupid sketch for her birthday.

  R.J. Berger : I think she'll like it.

  Miles Jenner : Yeah - if it's wrapped around a piece of jewelry, maybe. Dude, girls like Jenny don't spread for stupid sketches. They want to see price tags. You gotta spend that coin if you wanna get that loin.