Curb Your Enthusiasm (TV Series)

Larry vs. Michael J. Fox (2011)

Larry David: Larry David

Photos 

Quotes 

• Larry David : [explaining to his girlfriend's seven-year-old son, Greg, who Adolf Hitler was]  He didn't - he didn't really care for Jews. He thought they were a bit much.

  Greg : [gasps]  I would kick his butt.

  Larry David : Would you!

  Greg : Yes.

  Larry David : Good for you.

  [pointing to the next room] 

  Larry David : What's that - what are you watching in there?

  Greg : "Project Runway." Good show.

  Larry David : And what do you like about it?

  Greg : [very flamboyantly]  The fashion! It's, like, the best show ever!

  Larry David : You like fashion?

  Greg : Yes. I do.

  Larry David : [processing this]  Hmm.

  Greg : [pointing to a swastika Larry doodled]  Ooh! What's that right there?

  Larry David : Oh, that's called a, uh, swastika.

  Greg : [illustrating with arm motions]  I like how the lines just go straight and then up and then down and then straight and then up and then down. It's *beautiful.* My birthday's coming up in a week, so - can you get me one?

  Larry David : A swastika?

  Greg : Yeah.

  Larry David : I - I don't know, Greg, I'll have to think about that.

  Greg : They should start selling them in every gift shop in New York City.

  Larry David : Yeah, I don't think Jews would like that.

  Greg : [cheerfully]  Get a life, Jews!

• Susie Greene : [Greg has just given her a pillow sham with a swastika stitched on it]  What the... What? Where did you learn about this symbol?

  Greg : Larry taught me how to make a swastika.

  [Larry shakes his head in horror] 

  Greg : He wrote it on a piece of paper.

  Larry David : [nervously]  Greg... No, I...

  Greg : He was drawing, like, this evil man who hated Jews. What was his name again, Larry?

  Larry David : [panicking]  Hitler?

  Greg : [brightly]  Hitler! Yeah, Hitler.

  Susie Greene : Larry taught you how to make this?

  Larry David : No, I was...

  Jennifer : [to Larry]  You taught him how to make a swastika?

  Larry David : No, I was doodling...

  Susie Greene : [enraged]  What the hell are you thinking?

  Larry David : [backs away, desperately trying to defend himself]  I was doodling! I was just doodling!

  Susie Greene : On a PILLOW SHAM? You think this is an appropriate symbol to be petty-pointing on a pillow?

  [inadvertently walks right into the path of an approaching biker] 

  Jeff Greene : SUSIE, LOOK OUT!

  [shoves the screaming Susie out of the way, and the biker accidentally crashes into Jeff. Greg screams] 

• [Michael has given David a bottle of orange soda that he shook due to his Parkinson's; Larry opens the bottle and gets soaked as a result] 

  Larry David : [as he gets soaked]  Jesus Christ! What the hell? Did you shake that up on purpose?

  Michael J. Fox : [nonchalantly]  Parkinson's.

• [in Michael J. Fox's apartment, Michael comes across Larry drawing a Hitler mustache on an issue of Business Week magazine with the former's father-in-law Stephen Pollan on the front cover] 

  Michael J. Fox : What the fuck? Larry, what're you doing?

  Larry David : [startled]  Oh, I was just drawing a Hitler mustache.

  Michael J. Fox : [takes the magazine from Larry]  On my father-in-law! That's my father-in-law!

  Larry David : [in disbelief]  That's your father-in-law?

  Michael J. Fox : Well, yeah! He's a businessman. He's on the cover of Business Week magazine.

  Larry David : You're kidding! What the hell is he doing on the cover of a magazine?

  Michael J. Fox : [shows Larry the damage he did to the magazine]  Well, he's the Fuehrer now!

  Larry David : Oh, God. I'm so sorry. It's just that I like to see what people look like with Hitler mustaches.

  Michael J. Fox : [shows Larry the now destroyed magazine one final time]  He looks like Hitler. Mystery solved. My father-in-law looks like Hitler. I gotta get rid of this because he's coming over here and if he sees this...

  [Michael walks to the kitchen in his apartment to throw the magazine away] 

  Larry David : [interrupting]  I'm sorry again.

  Michael J. Fox : [as he tosses the magazine in the trash]  That's all right. Can I get you a soda or something, Larry?

  [Larry gets up off the sofa and heads to the kitchen; he sits down on a bar stool near the island] 

  Larry David : Oh, sure. That'd be great. Y'know, I mean, the thing is Hitler really ruined that mustache for everybody; and now, nobody could wear it.

  [Michael grabs a soda from the fridge and shakes it up before he gives it to Larry] 

  Larry David : Oh, thanks.

  [Larry opens the bottle and gets sprayed with soda as a result of Michael shaking up the bottle; Michael goes to grab some paper towels to give to Larry] 

  Larry David : Jesus Christ! What the hell?

  Michael J. Fox : [offers Larry some paper towels]  Ya want-?

  Larry David : Did you shake that up on purpose?

  Michael J. Fox : [nonchalantly]  Parkinson's.

  [Larry grabs the paper towels from Michael as he attempts to dry himself]