Gears of War 3 (2011 Video Game)

Lester Speight: Augustus Cole

Quotes 

• Augustus Cole : [failing an Active Reload]  Oh, no. Oh - oh *hell* *no!*

• Clayton Carmine : [discovering that the cable car to the Centennial Bridge is gone]  Well... *Shit.*

  Augustus Cole : Uh, anyone afraid-a heights?

  [Lambent stalks start growing behind them, blocking their way back] 

  Damon Baird : [quickly weighs his options]  Uhh - not anymore. Love heights! Love 'em. *F - *in' love 'em.

  Sam Byrne : [passing everyone hooks for ziplining]  Come on! The line still reaches the bridge!

  Augustus Cole : And that's our stop, so let's do this - !

  [starts ziplining, brings out pistol] 

  Augustus Cole : WHOO!

  Augustus Cole : [as the scene transitions to gameplay]  *Whoo-hoo-hoo!* I think I jus' invented a new sport, *bitches!*

  Damon Baird : [yelling at him from the other cable; somehow sarcastically]  Getting your ass shot off while dangling from a cable? Yeah, yeah, that'll catch on quick! The "*Ass*-Off Championships"!

• Anya Stroud : [when the Lambent Zerker shows up]  Lambent Berserker!

  Augustus Cole : [seeing the monster]  God - *DAMN*, you a ugly bitch!

  Marcus Fenix : [to Baird via comms]  *Baird, where's the damn Hammer?*

  Damon Baird : It's firing...

  [Beat] 

  Damon Baird : *NOW!*

  Dominic Santiago : [over comms; as the Hammer's laser activates]  Marcus! *Run!*

  Marcus Fenix : *RUN!* Everybody - get to the fort!

• Augustus Cole : [over radio with Marcus; about the Lambent Leviathan]  Marcus, whoo! That's one big *ugly* motherf - er!

  Marcus Fenix : Cole, can you see this shit?

  Augustus Cole : Baby, we got a grandstand view - we're crossing the bridge, right above the ship.

  Marcus Fenix : Any way you can kill this thing from where you are?

  [Cole looks at Baird, who makes sign language for blowing someone's head up] 

  Augustus Cole : Uh, puttin' it *scientifically?* We need to blow his brains out his *ass!*

  Marcus Fenix : Well, get Baird to come up with an idea!

  [ends transmission] 

• Augustus Cole : [coming across a playground turntable; laughing]  Hey, Baird, why don't you hop on an' I give you a push?

  Damon Baird : Uhhhhhhh, yeah, you know what? No thanks.

• Damon Baird : [approaching the Stranded barricade on Centennial Bridge; pointing to his forehead]  Am I the only one who can feel the crosshairs just about here?

  Sam Byrne : Hey - I saw movement. Top of the barricade. Stay sharp.

  [a pause, then...] 

  Augustus Cole : ...Helloooo? Anyone home? Knock, knock! We just passin' through. We just need a hand gettin' to our *SHIT!*

  [That last part was because the Locust at the barricade had started firing on them. The squad takes cover] 

  Augustus Cole : Huh. So much for diplomacy!

  Damon Baird : Yeah, what else do you expect from these Stranded shits? Let's get this over with.

  Sam Byrne : [aims her LongShot; pauses]  Hey - those aren't Stranded. They're Locust!

  Damon Baird : [after Sam shoots a Locust Drone]  Oh, *great!* Look who's back in town!

  Augustus Cole : Well, we *did* flood 'em out their tunnels.

• Augustus Cole : I hate to interrupt, people, but we got visitors!

• Augustus Cole : [inside the Corpser lair; seeing a newly-hatched Corpser]  Ah, so *that's* where Corpsers come from.

  Damon Baird : [in a false sing-song voice]  When a mommy Corpser and a daddy Corpser love each other very much...

  Augustus Cole : Whoa, stay back, Baird! It'll think the first thing it sees is its mother!

  Marcus Fenix : [completely unamused]  Why don't you two guys shut the *f - * up before we wake its mother?

  [instead, they accidentally get the hatchling's attention, causing it to scream] 

  Dominic Santiago : Well, there goes that idea!

  [They kill the hatchling, but it's already too late - a loud roar echoes throughout the lair] 

  Marcus Fenix : Ah, *shit* - *we woke mom!*

  Dominic Santiago : And she woke the family! Those damn eggs are hatching!

  Marcus Fenix : C'mon, kill 'em and get out of here!

• Augustus Cole : [after Anya mentions Prescott over the radio]  I heard "Prescott". Tell me that's jus' my old head injury?

  Damon Baird : [in disbelief]  *Prescott?*

  Marcus Fenix : What, do we have an echo here or something? Yeah, Prescott's back, Michaelson's dead, and my father's alive. Film at eleven.

• Damon Baird : [finding a large tree with cages hang from it; noticing the corpses inside]  Uh, what's in those cages?

  Marcus Fenix : [flatly]  It's a "Keep Out" sign.

  [Beat] 

  Augustus Cole : ...Well, it almos' worked!

• [friendly fire] 

  Dominic Santiago : Maybe you should take point.

  Dominic Santiago : [indignantly]  Hey!

  Damon Baird : Cease fire, asshole!

  Damon Baird : Hey, check your aim! Idiot...

  Augustus Cole : Same team!

  Anya Stroud : Check your aim!

  Sam Byrne : Hey, *d - *wad! *Open your eyes!*

• Augustus Cole : Oh, yeah! We got plenty of gasbags now! Choose any model you like!

• Damon Baird : [while killing Corpser hatchlings in the Corpser lair]  Uh... Isn't it bad luck to kill spiders or something?

  Augustus Cole : They ain't spiders! It's bad luck if we *don't* kill 'em!

• Marcus Fenix : [as his squad lures the Lambent Leviathan to the front of the Sovereign, below the Cenntenial Bridge]  Cole, you've got one pissed Leviathan in position. You ready?

  Augustus Cole : [as *his* squad fights their way to the Ticker crate above the Leviathan; with more Savage Locust appearing behind them]  Yo, give us a minute!

  Marcus Fenix : [frusturated]  Ah, tell Baird he's just blowing shit up, not writing a *goddamn symphony!*

  Damon Baird : [with Cole only; offended]  You know what - tell *him* I'm being a genius as fast as I can!

  Augustus Cole : [to Marcus]  Yeah, but we got our own problems up here!

  [Cole's squad finally manages to fend off the remaining Locust] 

  Marcus Fenix : Cole, you're gonna be scrapin' us up in a bucket if you don't get a move on!

  Augustus Cole : Find some cover fast, or your ass gonna be swimmin' in some glowie gravy!

• Dominic Santiago : [debating whether to use the trenches to reach their objective]  Looks like we're gonna have to cut throught the trenches. Unless anyone prefers a suicide run across open ground.

  Damon Baird : I vote we sneak around and avoid getting shot in the ass for a change!

  Augustus Cole : Hell, yeah, I second that!

  Marcus Fenix : Carried. Unanimously.

• Marcus Fenix : [trying to shake the crash off]  Oh, *man*... Everybody in one piece?

  Augustus Cole : [looking dazed]  Uhh, let me get back to you on that...

• Myrrah : [discovering Marcus and co. leaving the Corpser's lair; to the Locust]  It's him! Alert the fleet. I want everyout post from here to Azura full of readines. And make sure we don't lose him again.

  Dominic Santiago : [seeing her]  Goddamn, she's still alive? How the hell did she survive the flood?

  Marcus Fenix : So... She's still runnin' the show.

  Augustus Cole : [taken aback by Myrrah's Tempest]  Whoo! Look at the size of that bug.

  Marcus Fenix : Hmph. I got your number, bitch.

• Augustus Cole : [start of battle vs. Lambent Zerker; noticing that something is wrong with the monster's chest area]  The *hell* is that flappy thing in her chest?

  Damon Baird : [disgusted]  Ugh... Looks like her ribs opening! Okay, that's gotta be a weak spot. *Aim for it!*

• Augustus Cole : [after the Hammer of Dawn supposedly destroys the Lambent Zerker]  ... Did we fry that bitch?

  Sam Byrne : Looks that way.

  Marcus Fenix : All right, everybody get inside. We've got unfinished buisness to...

  [a loud *Thud!* interrupts Marcus. Eveyone turns toward the gate] 

  Marcus Fenix : What the *hell...?*

  [More thuding, then the Lambent Zerker, still alive and madder than ever, jumps over the wall] 

  Marcus Fenix : Go on! Everybody, get to the rear of the fort! *Run!*

• Sam Byrne : [when the squad encounters the new Drudge Lambent in Hanover; disgusted]  What the *f - * is *that?*

  Augustus Cole : Whatever the hell that is, tha's a *new* world record in *ugly!*

• Augustus Cole : [in the Hanover grocery store; finding a standee of himself as a Thrashball star]  You ever feel like you're dead, but no one told you?

• Augustus Cole : [finding caged Tickers in the trenches]  Hey, a pet shop! Haha, hey, Baird, look! That one's cute! Ha-ha!

  Damon Baird : [sarcastically]  Yeah! It can do tricks, too! Like blowing up in your face!