- Serena van der Woodsen: [can't choose between boyfriends] I have a whole new appreciation for Big Love.
- Blair Waldorf: Well, even in Utah, only the men are allowed to have more than one spouse. Which I've come to realize is extremely sexist.
- Juliet Sharp: I should have known that taking down Serena involved wearing the perfect dress.
- Jenny Humphrey: Well, any time I can combine style with revenge. Plus, this isn't exactly my first masquerade party.
- Juliet Sharp: I'll see you inside.
- Serena van der Woodsen: [re The Post printing scandalous news] Mom, you have to call them and make them print a retraction and an apology. You know that it's not true.
- Lily van der Woodsen: Half of New York saw him kissing you at the ballet. Dean Reuther would like to see us in her office.
- Blair Waldorf: [to attentive assistant after pedicure] What are you, a foot fetishist? They're done!
- Juliet Sharp: [to devious Jenny] You know, if you stuck around here, we would *all* be working for you in a week.
- Blair Waldorf: [to Serena, who's on Page Six again] Don't look at me like that. You're the one who's black and white and read all over.
- Chuck Bass: There's something alluring about an angel drawn to the dark side.
- Blair Waldorf: Or a devil redeemed.
- [they get amorous, and she gets inspired]
- Blair Waldorf: A masquerade!
- Chuck Bass: Hmm.
- Blair Waldorf: Where inhibitions can't help but break free.
- Blair Waldorf: My black Balenciaga will be perfect to publicly condemn you.
- Chuck Bass: I love public!
- Blair Waldorf: I love condemnation!
- Chuck Bass: [blurts out in the heat of the moment] I love you!
- [realizes what he just let slip out]
- Blair Waldorf: Of course, no one does black like Dior.
- Chuck Bass: [explaining his verbal slip-up] Scientifically speaking, intense pleasure does dull the other senses.
- Nate Archibald: [chuckles] Relax, Chuck. Girls understand that when a guy says that during sex, it doesn't mean "I love you." It means "I love having sex with you."
- Juliet Sharp: [in designer showroom] Not so sure white's your color.
- Serena van der Woodsen: What are you doing here?
- Juliet Sharp: I assume you mean a poor girl like me can't afford to shop in a place like this.
- Rufus Humphrey: [Lily explains when and where the trouble started] Boarding school? Serena was a minor.
- Dorota Kishlovsky: [Blair took off her staid party dress and is stepping out in her underwear] Where are you going?
- Blair Waldorf: Straight to hell with all the other sinners.
- [off to the party she goes]
- Gossip Girl: [re Serena] That Carolina Herrera dress does make her look like an angel. But this decision is demonic.
- Rufus Humphrey: Boarding school? Serena was just a kid.
- Lily van der Woodsen: Serena was never a kid, believe me.
- Blair Waldorf: It's no worse than what you tried to do to me and Chuck!
- Serena van der Woodsen: What? I had nothing to do with you coming here in your underwear. You knew what you had to lose.