The Middle (TV Series)

Taking Back the House (2011)

Neil Flynn: Mike Heck

Quotes 

• Brick Heck : Wait, who's the lion?

  Mike Heck : I am. I'm the lion. I'm the lion in ALL of the stories.

• Axl Heck : This is unfair. You're parents. It's your job to put your kids first.

  Mike Heck : Who says?

  Axl Heck : I'll tell you who says. "The Giving Tree". You're the ones who read us the book. The tree gave up all its leaves and - and its apples and its branches, and it let the little boy cut it down so it could be a canoe. And it didn't complain and go nuts and kick anyone off the TV. It wanted to be a stump. It was happy!

• Axl Heck : God, if you don't want to do anything for us, why'd you even have kids?

  Mike Heck : 'Cause babies are cute. If you had come out teenagers, we might've had to rethink.

• Brick Heck : I looked up "Moby Dick", the hard edition.

  Mike Heck : Uh, you didn't.

  Brick Heck : And you can't believe what came up.

  Mike Heck : Oh, I'm afraid we can.

  Brick Heck : All these first editions and stuff.

  Frankie Heck : Oh, see?

  Mike Heck : Oh, good for you, Brick.

  Frankie Heck : That's what the Internet is for - books.

  Brick Heck : Oh, and then I met some guy online who wants to meet me at the park.

  [leaves] 

  Frankie Heck : Maybe we should have taken him to the library.