Community (TV Series)
The Science of Illusion (2010)
Chevy Chase: Pierce Hawthorne
Photos
Quotes
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Pierce Hawthorne : How do you know it was one of us?
Dean Pelton : Well, if I may answer a question with a question, why are you dressed like a wizard?
[Pierce rambles while pointing a cookie wand at Craig]
Dean Pelton : Okay, is he having a stroke? I'll tell you how I know. Security Officers Bennett and Edison found this at the scene. Hmm? The little hat says "Chang" on it.
[Jeff glares accusingly at Britta who looks away]
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Jeff Winger : Hey, Pierce, I just remembered. Right before you got here, some guy was delivering level-six ceremonial robes?
Pierce Hawthorne : What? Why didn't you tell me?
Jeff Winger : Maybe if you run you can catch him.
Pierce Hawthorne : Way to use your brain, Winger.
[exits]
Jeff Winger : Abed, how fast can you run to the Theater Department?
Abed Nadir : Thirty-seven seconds.
Jeff Winger : Don't come back without something ridiculous. Go.
[Abed exits]
Britta Perry : Guys, you realize you're exploiting the naiveté of a man who is being brainwashed by a cult.
Shirley Bennett : Well, it sounds a lot less fun when you say it.
Jeff Winger : Everything does. She's a buzz kill.
Britta Perry : I'm not a buzz kill.
Shirley Bennett , Annie Edison : Hmm.
Troy Barnes : Yeah, that doesn't really describe it. You're more of a fun-vampire, because you don't suck blood, you just suck.
Pierce Hawthorne : [enters dejected] He wasn't there.
Jeff Winger : [Abed enters carrying a box] Oh, I think Abed found him.
Pierce Hawthorne : Hey, give me.
[opens box and gasps]
Pierce Hawthorne : It's amazing.
[Jeff stifles a laugh behind his hand]
Pierce Hawthorne : Wow. It is absolutely gorgeous. How do I look?
Troy Barnes : May I?
Pierce Hawthorne : Yeah.
[Troy places a floppy wizards hat on Pierce's head]
Jeff Winger : Magical.
Annie Edison : Great.
[chuckles]
Shirley Bennett : Heh.
[chuckles]
Pierce Hawthorne : [laughs] Of course, the only one who doesn't like this is Britta. You ever get tired of being a buzz kill?