Community (TV Series)
Interpretive Dance (2010)
Jim Rash: Dean Pelton
Photos
Quotes
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Dean Pelton : You know, we laugh, but the fact is, student-teacher relationships do happen. And they are a magnet for lawsuits, so we do stay vigilant. In fact, physically attractive students and faculty are actually placed on a watch list. And are ranked by their potential to incite fraternization.
Jeff Winger : You rank people by how hot they are?
Jeff Winger : Yes, we do... number two.
Professor Michelle Slater : Dean Pelton?
Dean Pelton : Yes, Professor Seven... uh, Professor Slater?
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Jeff Winger : Professor Slater, quick question.
Professor Michelle Slater : You know the answer, Mr. Winger. I don't date students, even if you are no longer in my statistics class.
Jeff Winger : I'm actually kind of seeing someone right now, thank you very much.
Professor Michelle Slater : Really? How's that going?
Jeff Winger : Fine for now. She's smart and pretty. But sometimes I feel like she's just waiting for me to stop talking and take off my pants.
Professor Michelle Slater : [Door slams shut] She is.
Jeff Winger : I've never been someone's dirty little secret.
Professor Michelle Slater : I've never had a dirty little secret. It's so unprofessional. But the sneaking does make the sex 38% hotter.
Jeff Winger : Wow, you do like statistics, don't you?
[Knock at the door]
Jeff Winger : [Jeff and Michelle break their embrace, separate, Dean Pelton barges in] Hey, midterms and whatever.
Professor Michelle Slater : Chalk.
Dean Pelton : Professor Slater, there's that transcript you wanted. Jeff, I didn't expect to see you here
[lasciviously]
Dean Pelton : Hopefully, I'm not... interrupting.
[uncomfortable laugher]
Dean Pelton : You know, we laugh... but, the fact is, student/teacher relationships do happen, and they are a magnet for lawsuits. So we do stay vigilant. In fact, physically attractive students and faculty are actually placed on a watch list and are ranked by their potential to incite fraternization.
Jeff Winger : You rank people by how hot they are?
Dean Pelton : [lasciviously] You got it... number two.
Professor Michelle Slater : Dean Pelton.
Dean Pelton : Yes, Professor Seven... Uh, Slater.
Professor Michelle Slater : I'll return this tomorrow.
Dean Pelton : Okay, then. You guys be extra careful now. Two people of your rankings in this small a room... with this type of lighting and his upper body and what her heels and hemline are doing to enhance what were already quite a few favors from God... it's all the more important to keep it tasteful.
[laughs, Jeff and Michelle display looks of disgust]
Professor Michelle Slater : [Door closes, Jeff and Michelle embrace] I think he might have ruined...
Jeff Winger : It's dead.
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Dean Pelton : Would you describe yourself as boyfriend and girlfriend?
Professor Michelle Slater : Yes.
Jeff Winger : Eh...
Professor Michelle Slater : What?
Dean Pelton : Oh, boy.
Jeff Winger : It's semantics, really, isn't it?
Professor Michelle Slater : [laughs] We've slept together every night for the last three weeks. How would you describe me?
Jeff Winger : [emphatically] The best friend ever!