- Kevin: I've taken dumps before... it's fun, you take a picture of it, you send it out to your friends... you don't pick it up and whip it around your head like a churro!
- Terry Bradshaw: [on the phone] Hey, Pete. It's Terry Bradshaw.
- Pete Eckhart: Hello, there.
- Terry Bradshaw: You think I'm just gonna let you cheat your friends just so you can win?
- Pete Eckhart: Yeah, I was kind of hoping you would.
- Terry Bradshaw: Ain't gonna happen! One other thing, all right? Do you hear me?
- Pete Eckhart: What's that?
- Terry Bradshaw: I hated my Uncle Pete.