NCIS (TV Series)
Outlaws and In-Laws (2009)
Muse Watson: Michael Franks
Quotes
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NCIS Director Leon Vance : What are we going to hold her on, Mike? She hasn't committed a crime.
Mike Franks : Conspiracy to be a bitch?
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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [Mike Franks is standing guard by the door with a gun as DiNozzo enters] Hello?
Mike Franks : DiNozzo! You should have told me you were comin'.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : I called and you didn't pick up.
Mike Franks : I'm not gonna answer the phone, I'm a fugitive!
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : So what do you want me to do?
Mike Franks : Knock.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Why would I knock? There's no lock on that door.
Mike Franks : Someone may be on the other side with a gun.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Why would somebody be standing on the other side with a gun?
Mike Franks : Because there's no lock on the door!
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Special Agent Jethro Gibbs : Those two men you killed, why were they after you?
Mike Franks : Damn, Probie. I was hoping you could tell me.
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Mike Franks : [re: Leyla and Amira] You put them in jeopardy.
Shada Shakarji : It would never have turned violent - I was assured of it - if not for you.
Mike Franks : I got news for you, lady. I didn't pull a gun on them. I didn't fire the first shot.
Shada Shakarji : Shut up. I don't believe you.
Mike Franks : I'm not proud to cop to this... I wasn't ready for them. I didn't get tipped off. Hell, I never even heard them coming.
Shada Shakarji : Your... defenses were down?
Mike Franks : I was playing with my granddaughter. We were up in the boat. She wanted to paint her name on the side. Then these two guys are standing there, pointing guns up at me. Leyla noticed them from the house.
Shada Shakarji : *My* Leyla? My meek, quiet, little girl?
Mike Franks : Unloaded six shots, rapid fire, from a .22 hunting rifle. Five hits.
Shada Shakarji : She knows to shoot?
Mike Franks : I taught her. Never underestimate a mama bear when her cub's in danger.
Shada Shakarji : ...That I believe.
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Mike Franks : You gonna stand there glaring at me, probie or you gonna give me a hand with the bags... or you gonna shoot me?
Special Agent Jethro Gibbs : No, I thought I'd ask you a few questions first, then I may shoot you.
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NCIS Director Leon Vance : How's the statement coming, Mike?
Mike Franks : ...Uh, it's a load of crap. Probie called me on it.
NCIS Director Leon Vance : You lied to us?
Mike Franks : I'm sure you're shocked and appalled, Director.
NCIS Director Leon Vance : I'm relieved. Of all your unsavory character traits, I find that to be the most palatable. At least there aren't any more bodies.
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Mike Franks : Lady Ziva, glad you're here. Gibbs send you?
Ziva David : We have been instructed to sit on the baby.
[Franks gives DiNozzo a puzzled look]
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Well, it's gonna be fine, Mike, and it's good to see you. Have a mint.
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Mike Franks : [to Shada about Leyla and Amira] They're safer with me than they are with you. I *can't* let you pull them back into the fold.
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Mike Franks : You know who I am.
Shada Shakarji : The Greeks would call you Charon. Your boat conducts the dead to Hell, leaving a trail of misery in your wake.
Mike Franks : Yeah, lady, and you're all smiles and sunshine.
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Shada Shakarji : I have been tracking your every move, since the day your accursed offspring ruined my daughter.
Mike Franks : [seething] I have never hit a woman, but...
Shada Shakarji : I find that hard to believe.
Mike Franks : I'm finding it hard to believe you're actually a woman!
[she curses at him in Arabic]
Mike Franks : You manipulative, stubborn old hag!
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Mike Franks : [as he's leaving] Why don't you put something in front of the door?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Nah, I'll just stand here with my gun.