Glee (TV Series)

Theatricality (2010)

Mark Salling: Noah 'Puck' Puckerman

Photos 

Quotes 

• Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : [after singing "Beth" to Quinn]  I know you're giving her up, but before you do, I think you should name her Beth. If you'll let me, I'd really like to be there when she's born. I'd really like to meet her.

• Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : There's something I want to say to Quinn. And I want everybody to hear it.

  Will Schuester : All right.

  Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : At first I didn't really get this theatrical assignment; being larger than life and putting it all out there, 'cause I'm kind of like that all the time. It's how my dad was, too. He was too busy being all crazy and rock and roll to be there for his kid. And you know what? I didn't care that my dad was a badass. I just wanted him to be there. And he never was. And then I learned all this Kiss stuff, and while Jackie Daniels is a great name for, like, a powerboat or something, it's not right for a baby girl. So if my Kiss mates will help me out, I got a better idea.

• Will Schuester : Little monsters, take a bow. All right! Ladies, Kurt, I am really, really impressed. Siéntate. You know... you know what the best part is? Each one of your costumes shows off a different aspect of your personalities.

  Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : Wait. Where's Rachel? I mean, I only noticed because, like, five minutes have gone by without her saying something totally obnoxious.

• Mercedes Jones : Rachel kind of got some intense news yesterday.

  Quinn Fabray : We were spying on Vocal Adrenaline, and...

  Will Schuester : You guys, that's not fair! You gotta stop doing that. But, uh, you know, what... what'd you find out?

  Mercedes Jones : Okay, y'all ready? Miss Corcoran, their coach? She's Rachel's mom.

  Will Schuester : Are you serious?

  Artie Abrams : Way to bury the lead, Mercedes.

  Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : We're screwed. Rachel's gonna jump ship over to Vocal Adrenaline.

  Rachel Berry : [entering]  Never. I really don't want to talk about it, though. I'm still processing the news. And my dads are moving my therapist to our spare room later this afternoon. All I know is that I'm not going anywhere, and I've chosen a Lady Gaga look the longing for a childhood I was deprived of.

  Brittany S. Pierce : You look terrible. I look awesome.

  Mercedes Jones : I think it's the Kermit the Frog look.

  Kurt Hummel : [a stuffed animal falls off Rachel's dress]  And we have a jumper.

  Rachel Berry : Well, my dads can't sew, so these are just stapled on.

  Will Schuester : Guys, why don't we worry about this later and maybe try to focus on the song?

• Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : You're wrong. It's a really good name. It's a rock star name.

  Quinn Fabray : You want to name our daughter "Jack Daniels"? She's a girl!

  Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : Okay, fine, whatever. Jackie Daniels.

  Quinn Fabray : The name is not the point. I told you this. I'm giving up the baby so I don't have to do this with you. This is good for you. Now you can go off and be a rock star yourself.

• Artie Abrams : It's so weird.

  Finn Hudson : This so isn't you.

  Tina Cohen-Chang : I feel like an Asian Branch Davidian.

  Will Schuester : Tina, are there any other looks you can try?

  Santana Lopez : Biker chick?

  Finn Hudson : Cowgirl?

  Mercedes Jones : Hood rat.

  Quinn Fabray : Computer programmer.

  Brittany S. Pierce : Cross-country skier.

  Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : Catholic schoolgirl.

  Brittany S. Pierce : Happy Meal, no onions. Or a chicken.

• Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : What's up with this Gaga dude? He just, like, dresses weird, right? Like Bowie?

  Kurt Hummel : Lady Gaga is a woman. She's only the biggest pop act to come along in decades. She's boundary-pushing, the most theatrical performer of our generation. And she changes her look faster than Brit changes sexual partners.

  Brittany S. Pierce : That's true.