House M.D. (TV Series)
Remorse (2010)
Hugh Laurie: Dr. Gregory House
Photos
Quotes
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Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : Why do you want to meet her so badly?
Dr. Gregory House : Psychopaths always fascinate me. I think its their cultural literacy and strong family values.
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Valerie : I'm not so different than anybody else. Everyone I've ever known: my family, my classmates, the people I work with. They're all out for themselves. Difference is, I could admit it to myself.
Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : She kind of reminds me of someone I know.
Dr. Gregory House : Tell me about it.
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Dr. James Wilson : Of all the people in the world you've hurt.
Dr. Gregory House : Not everyone has a name that's so easy to find in the White Pages.
Dr. James Wilson : Uh, I'm in there. So's Cuddy.
Dr. Gregory House : And yet I picked him. It's funny isn't it?
Dr. James Wilson : Yes, it's hilarious. Great to see what a success your therapy was.
[Wilson leaves]
Dr. Gregory House : We said we'd never go to sleep angry.
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Dr. Gregory House : [to the team over the speakphone] But in the great game of chess that is our relationship, Wilson only sees one move ahead. I see dozens. That is why he will never mate me... That's a Chess term.
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Dr. Gregory House : The fact that you fired her takes it from a little complicated to a little moronic.
Dr. Eric Foreman : It was the only way I could...
Dr. Gregory House : It wasn't because you were too in love with her. It's because you were too in love with your career. We're almost at my floor, so I'll summarize. Your problem not mine.
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Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : No one's going to risk their life save her.
Dr. Gregory House : Man, one false accusation from a psychopath and you turn out to be a bummer... I'm going to go see if Wilson has any liver left.
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Dr. Chris Taub : Fourteen-year-old boy, joint pain and excess hair growth.
Dr. Gregory House : Tell him to masturbate no more than 3 times daily with meals. Next.
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Dr. Gregory House : [to Thirteen and Foreman] Go have sex.
Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : No, thanks.
Dr. Gregory House : Fine, I'll cover the Viagra and the lubricants. Just get me a receipt.
Dr. Eric Foreman : We have zero feelings for each other.
Dr. Gregory House : Well, that's too bad 'cause things worked much better when you did. Would it help if I slept with her?
Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : We were getting to a diagnosis.
Dr. Gregory House : No, we were already at the diagnosis. You were creating a fake argument about an irrelevant treatment issue 'cause you can't stand to be around each other. So have sex, fight or quit, I don't care. Whatever you're doing now isn't working.
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Dr. Gregory House : [to the team] Those of you who haven't slept together, you can go. Everyone else, stay behind.
[Chase leaves. Everyone looks at Taub]
Dr. Chris Taub : Oh, sorry.
[to Thirteen]
Dr. Chris Taub : That was our secret, right?
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Dr. Gregory House : [to Valerie] Hi, I'm Dr. House. How long have you been a psychopath?
Valerie : [looks at Thirteen] Are you kidding?
Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : He's not.
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Dr. Gregory House : [Speaking of Cuddy] She wasn't in love with me.
Dr. James Wilson : The fact that you can't admit it, just proves my point.
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Dr. Gregory House : Maybe because I recognize sending someone to the poor house is a little more serious than editing a snapshot.
Dr. James Wilson : No, it's because Cuddy actually means something to you, which makes it much harder to apologize.
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Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : [to House] You're taking the case because she's hot?
Dr. Gregory House : No, that would be an accident of genetics. It's because she's hot and her husband is ugly. It's a fascinating window into the mysteries of human psychology. Also, she's really hot.
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Dr. Gregory House : I know there are lipstick lesbians. Are there nail polish remover bisexuals?
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Dr. Gregory House : [about Valerie] Get her to radiotherapy.
Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : We can't start radiation without immunoassays on her urine.
Dr. Eric Foreman : Great, so you cast a spell and magically fix her kidney so she can give us some urine to test.
Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : We have some left over from admission.
Dr. Eric Foreman : Not enough for a completely accurate reading.
Thirteen - Dr. Hadley : Then how about partially accurate?
Dr. Gregory House : Those of you who haven't slept together, you can go. Everyone else, stay behind.
[Chase gets up and leaves the room, but Taub remains in the room]
Dr. Chris Taub : Oh, sorry.
[to Thirteen]
Dr. Chris Taub : That was our secret, right?
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Dr. Eric Foreman : [to House] Did I mention that the 27-year-old female is really hot. And her husband is really not.
Dr. Gregory House : Wild guess. He's rich.
Dr. Eric Foreman : Not unless social workers have begun pulling in the big money recently.