The Penguins of Madagascar (TV Series)

Roger Dodger/Skorca! (2009)

Richard Kind: Roger

Quotes 

• Roger : A mind switching machine. Huh. Is this gonna hurt?

  Kowalski : Just a little pinch, followed by the brief sensation of a thousand suns exploding in your skull.

  Roger : Do I get a lollipop?

• Roger : [singing]  I like happy frogs and belly flops, not big meanies or special ops.

• Skipper : Roger, how did you get past our security field?

  Roger : Me? Oh, I just came in through the front door. Right over there.

  Kowalski : In that case, according to security protocol, you are either an enemy agent, or our guest.

• Roger : [singing]  When you hear the night's last flush / Then, my dear, it's time to hush / One or two, either number / Says to you, peaceful slumber / Feel the drench from the broken pipe / Oh, that stench, it's mighty ripe / Swat those flies, close your eyes / Drift off to my stinky lullaby.

• Roger : But I tried everything. I asked them nicely, I baked them muffins...

  [Rico grunts] 

  Skipper : Good point, Rico. Have you tried bashing their heads 'til they go crying to their little rat mamas?

  Roger : Isn't that a little violent?

  Skipper : If it's done properly.

• [the penguins and Roger watch Rico in Roger's body beat up the rats] 

  Roger : Wow. I can't believe I'm doing all this. I have such guilt.

  Private : But you have to remember, Roger

  [He points to Rico] 

  Private : That isn't really you.

  Roger : Still, I can't stand violence of any-

  [He regurgitates a wooden sword, a bazooka and a bomb] 

  Roger : What am I doing with all this horrible stuff? This is terrible!

  Private : No, Roger, you'll have to remember...

  [He points to Roger] 

  Private : This isn't really you.

  Skipper : [pointing to Rico]  I thought you said that wasn't really him.

  Private : Well, I...

  Skipper : Pick a lane, here, Private.