- Uncle Ruckus: [Depressed over his test results revealing he has African blood] Well I'm black now, the very foist thing I did was quit all my jobs, I'm probably going to have to start selling crack, or rapping, or rapping about selling crack.
- Uncle Ruckus: A white doctor is 99.9% reliable. Black doctor is an oxymoron, unless it's a witch doctor.
- Uncle Ruckus: This looks like a damn astronaut shoe. I'm black. I'm not walkin' to the Moon, I'm walkin' to the liquor store.
- Debra Leevil: What network do you work for?
- Animation executive: B.E.T.
- Debra Leevil: And what does that stand for?
- Animation executive: Black Entertainment...
- Debra Leevil: NO! Black *Evil* Television. It's not enough that the shows are bad. They have to be evil as well.
- Wedgie Rudlin: Mistress Leevil, remember when you asked us for a way to destroy the minds of black children at an even earlier age?
- Debra Leevil: Oh sure.
- Wedgie Rudlin: Well, you'll be happy to know that I started B.E.T. Animation to do just that.
- Uncle Ruckus: I can't sit here and let y'all badmouth my president. Did any of y'all n---as hear the president when he said Iraq was central to the global war on terror? Or did y'all miss it 'cause he wasn't speakin' in baboon.
- Wedgie Rudlin: Okay, let's talk about some new shows. As you know, we're starting BET Animation. Here's what I wanna see. I'm thinking rappers. Young M.C. roller skating. Edginess. He's going too fast. His brakes don't work. We'll get Tone Loc to do the voice. Okay, hm... how about an animated version of Hamburglar? He's a hungry thug. It's gritty like The Wire. He does a drive-by on Burger King. McDonald's can co-finance. We'll call it: Beef. Wait a minute. I'm seeing a Flintstones thing happening here. Dino could be a rottweiler, maybe a pit bull. Instead of Bedrock, we're in Africa. We're keeping it real. You got that?
- Animation executive: Got it, Wedgie.