The Closer (TV Series)

Live Wire (2008)

G.W. Bailey: Louie Provenza

Quotes 

• Louie Provenza : I'm telling' you, this is the dumbest snipe hunt the chief as ever sent us on. I'm out here pounding the pavement like some damn rookie.

  Andy Flynn : What's the matter? Your Medicare shoes don't like to walk uphill?

  Louie Provenza : One of 'em's about to walk up your ass!

• Louie Provenza : Flynn, what in the hell are you doin'?

  Andy Flynn : I'm using my head as an antenna. You wanna try?

• Mike Tao : [pulling out a swab]  Now this is the latest in LAPD technology.

  [Wipes it on suspect's ring and rubs it against a metal contraption] 

  Will Pope : Lt. Provenza, what is the bag that Lt. Tao has?

  Louie Provenza : I believe that holds his personal grooming items.

  Mike Tao : [to suspect]  You don't want this to turn red.

  Will Pope : OK, what is he doing now?

  Louie Provenza : Well, it looks like he is about to spray the suspect's ring with a little squirt of breath freshener.

  Mike Tao : Oooooh, it's positive.

  Dean Murphy : Oh, man.