- Tabitha Wilson: [to Dixon] Did you kick his ass?
- Harry Wilson: Mom.
- Tabitha Wilson: What? That's not the first thing you thought of when you heard he was in a fight. Then maybe that's why he lost.
- Dixon Wilson: I didn't lose.
- Tabitha Wilson: Never worry about being fair. Just grab onto those jewels and twist them like a garbage bag.
- Harry Wilson: Mom!
- Annie Wilson: Dad, I still can't believe you grew up in a house like this.
- Dixon Wilson: I can't believe you ever left.
- Dixon Wilson: [to Annie] But still, it's gonna be a lot easier for you. I mean, come on. You're a cute girl. Dudes are gonna be throwing themselves at you.
- Annie Wilson: Oh, please. You had, like a million friends.
- Dixon Wilson: There, back home, and they all knew, you know? About the whole adoption story? Just don't want to have to tell my story over and over and over again.
- Annie Wilson: Then don't. All they need to know is that you're my brother. That's my story.
- [first lines]
- Dixon Wilson: This sucks.
- Debbie Wilson: Dixon, how about a new phrase like "this bites" or "this blows"? because you've been saying "this sucks" for the last 1,500 miles.
- Dixon Wilson: 'Cause it sucks.
- Harry Wilson: Your mother and I have given up a lot for this move, too.
- Annie Wilson: Really? Have you given up your boyfriend and the lead in the school play?
- Harry Wilson: As a matter of fact, I have. He's heartbroken about it and so am I.
- Annie Wilson: You're such a dork.
- Annie Wilson: Grandma!
- Dixon Wilson: [uneasy tone] You know... I've seen one of her old movies on Showtime the other night, right? Some 1980s romance-drama.
- Annie Wilson: So? She's got a lot of her old movies on TV.
- Dixon Wilson: In one scene, she was naked... frontal nudity. It's just not right.
- Tabitha Wilson: [to Debbie] You wanna help? Go yell at the gardener for parking his crap wagon in my driveway.
- Debbie Wilson: Actually, that's our crap wagon, Tabitha.
- Tabitha Wilson: Well, then park it around the corner so the neighbors won't notice.
- Erin Silver: [to Annie] I'm Silver.
- Annie Wilson: Silver?
- Erin Silver: Well, you can call me Erin, but I'm not gonna respond. So look, I wasn't plannig on making you feel welcome here, but then I saw the sticker and I thought, "Hey, maybe the principal's daughter isn't such a big loser after all."
- Harry Wilson: [to Dixon] Look, I'm gonna talk to your coach tomorrow. We'll get this all worked out.
- Debbie Wilson: And make sure he's not too rough on our baby.
- Annie Wilson: Yeah, 'cause he is such a delicate flower.
- Adrianna Duncan: [to Naomi] I love that dress.
- Naomi Clark: Oh, you know me, Adrianna. Early birthday present from myself.
- Annie Wilson: [to Silver] If I hurt your feelings by sitting with someone you don't like, then I'm sorry.
- Erin Silver: It's not that I don't like her. I hate her. Naomi is the Antichrist.
- Annie Wilson: Well, the Antichrist didn't trash me in front of half a million people. You did.
- Kelly Taylor: Silver, how many times have we had a talk about this blog of yours? All it does is cause problems.
- Erin Silver: Yeah, well, that's what blogs are supposed to do. Cause problems. You know, you can't make me stop. It's not like it's a school activity or...
- Kelly Taylor: Okay, I'm not talking to you as the guidance counselor right now. I am talking to you as your sister.
- Erin Silver: Okay, then as my sister, you know what Naomi did and why I hate her.
- Kelly Taylor: Yes, but this didn't hurt Naomi. It hurt Annie. Come on, you've got to let go of that anger. It's not doing you any good. You don't want to end up like Mom.
- Naomi Clark: I cannot belive you told your dad everything! Are you kidding me?
- Annie Wilson: I didn't tell him anything. He recognized the paper. Mr. Matthews could tell, too. I gave you my old term paper so you could take notes off it and get ideas on how to write your own paper, not to copy the entire thing word for word. My dad confronted me with both papers in his hands. What was I supposed to do?
- Naomi Clark: Lie. Cry. Threaten him. Make something up. Be creative.
- Annie Wilson: You sound like a spoiled brat.
- Naomi Clark: Well, you sound like a little bitch! And just so we're simply clear, you are completely disinvited to my birthday party!
- Annie Wilson: Like I care!
- Naomi Clark: Oh, you should.
- Debbie Wilson: I have a better idea, I can drive you home and we can swap stories about Harry's penis.
- Nat Bussichio: [working an espresso machine] Uh! I'm never gonna learn to work this machine. Whatever happened to regular coffee? Willie!
- Annie Wilson: [to Dixon] Aren't you a little freaked out starting over at a new school? And, like a week late?
- Dixon Wilson: What are you worried about? You already got, like a boyfriend out here.
- Harry Wilson: I'm the first to admit that I wasn't the greatest guy back then.
- Debbie Wilson: I'm more concerned with the kind of guy you are now.
- Ryan Matthews: [re her sarcastic comment re his financial standing] You should try applying some of that caustic wit to your term paper that's due tomorrow.
- Naomi Clark: Actually, it's done. I decided it's better to do it than fight it.
- Ryan Matthews: Well, I cannot wait to read that masterpiece.
- Naomi Clark: You know, why are you always so mean to me?
- Ryan Matthews: This isn't being mean.
- [to bartender:]
- Ryan Matthews: She's under-aged. Don't serve her.
- [to Naomi:]
- Ryan Matthews: Oh, I guess that was mean. Oops!
- Tracy Clark: [embarrassing guest] Then, Harry... What were we? Like, seventeen?
- Harry Wilson: [just wishes she would leave] I don't know. Uh, maybe we should call it...
- [gets up]
- Tracy Clark: Then Harry decides that he would like to climb on the H of the Hollywood sign, because he thinks it looks like a ladder. Well, the whole thing comes crashing down and he's flying fifty feet. Oh, my God, did we laugh! I mean, he's lucky he wasn't killed!
- Harry Wilson: Well, that was a long time ago.
- [gets up]
- Harry Wilson: Can I call you a cab?
- Tracy Clark: Oh, I have a better idea.
- [puts on coat, then, with a glint in her eyes:]
- Tracy Clark: Why don't you drive me home?
- Debbie Wilson: [with fake grin] Oh, or even better: *I* could drive you home, and we could swap stories about Harry's penis.
- Tracy Clark: [blanches] I have enough of my own, thank you. I'll see myself out. Good night.
- Harry Wilson: [uncomfortably, as Tracy leaves:] Mm. Uh-hmm. Uh...
- Debbie Wilson: [to Harry] Now, okay, don't you ever give me grief about dating Morris Kornblum ever again, because *that* lady is
- [snickers]
- Debbie Wilson: Crazytown.
- Harry Wilson: Right. In my defense, I - I was a teenager, she had a beach house.
- [Debbie scoffs]
- Harry Wilson: Morris - Morris, he lived in a teepee.
- [points finger]
- Harry Wilson: You were twenty-two.
- Debbie Wilson: Yeah, yeah. Let's go see Annie's dress for tomorrow night.