Boy is told by his father that he always wanted a son to enlist. Boy is the youngest & only one left able to do so in the family, so he does as his father wants.
Boy turns into man, has two sons of his own. He's away for 6 months at a time, with two weeks break in between to spend time with his boys.
His boys are deeply affected by their fathers absence, the risk to his life & they're plagued with fear of possible loss.
Man says he doesn't want to be over of those father's who tells at his kids when he gets home.
Father is wounded, returns home & tries to save his leg. This process takes years. During this time his oldest son wears a great emotional burden of feeling like he has to be there for his father all the time, that he may still lose his father. So eldest son status close, helps his father and bears this weight. Father didn't intentionally place this weight on his son, yet he fails to see it is there, let alone get his son help.
Father is angry & frustrated about his damaged leg. Takes this out on his boys and his girlfriend. Father takes no responsibility for his own wellbeing, gets no therapy, no external help to help him learn coping mechanisms so he doesn't take his stuff out on his children.
The children bear the burden of this, particularly good oldest who is picked on, rather than guided.
Oldest boy wants to be a police officer, go to college. Be closer to his family, not deployed overseas.
Father says boy doesn't have the grades. That school is sending home notes asking him the father, to help his son with homework. Father claims he doesn't know how to do what the kids are doing today.
Father doesn't get a tutor for his son to help him realise how own dreams of going to college.
Father tells 17 year old son that I've be turns 18 either he needs to be enrolled in college or the army. Father constantly telling his eldest son that there's no way he's going to college, he'll be enlisting in the army. Son tells the camera that he is going to go to college even though his father doesn't believe him.
Youngest son is all gung-ho about joining the military. Youngest son, 12 years old ,is killed in a tragic accident (RIP Joey & condolences to the family).
Eldest son is now going to enlist as he feels that's the right thing to do. It's what Joey wanted to do. He feels he should do this.
Father has pushed son to enlist all his life. Father wanted his sons to enlist, as his father wanted him to enlist.
Son says the army isn't what he thought it was like when he was younger. He's suffering from depression yet is unsure why, could be his mother leaving, his father being shot, his brother dying, he doesn't know. He feels he isn't good enough, that he hasn't done as well as his father so isn't acceptable, that he'll never be good enough, that his younger brother would've done better and made their father proud, whereas he has failed to do so.
The father has another son with his new wife. While the son is only days/weeks old, the father tells the camera he wants his baby son to enlist when he grows up.
What a terrible story.
Father's in denial of the damage their deployment does to their children. No willingness to see this damage at any stage, to provide professional help, nor encouraging them to be their own men, their own person to follow their own dreams.
Instead it's like children bred for war by ignorant people who have an inability or unwillingness, to stop the generational damage & slaughter.
No personal accountability by the father.
His own unhappiness not even being enough to stop his son from possibly experiencing the same, instead telling him he must enlist.
This is generational damage being played out on the screen.
While it's interesting from the perspective that I've not encountered that particular situation myself, it's still the same abuse perpetrated all over the world by domineering, ignorant parents.
Father's should encourage their children to be their own people, to follow their own dreams. Support & love them in every way possible, including being there if dreams are needing to be changed.
Not to force their vocational wants onto their children.
Adults need to be responsible for their emotional wellbeing, to get therapy and do what's required to be okay so they don't abuse their children. They need to be switched on enough to realise their actions create harm and get professional help for their children, for as long as needed.
18 is still a child. Not an age to be shipped off to learn to kill.
I'm deeply concerned for this new baby, born in 2019?
What happens if that young boy turns out to want to be a drag queen? An actor, hairstylist, makeup artist, politician, vet, doctor, mechanic, janitor, pilot, physicist, or any other vocation? Will the father grow enough in this time to see how dreams for his child come second to the child's dream for themselves?
Will he get tutoring for his child if their grades aren't okay?
During all of this, will be get professional help for his eldest son, so he can work through all of his trauma? So he can heal & learn to love himself as he is, without constantly feeling he has to impress his father, that he'll never be good enough? All the while watching his new sibling grow up constantly surrounded by his father's presence and love, something he didn't get our have in his life.
Parenting doesn't stop because you've forced your child or of home, or they've left home of their own volition.
This father has a responsibilty to help his son, himself and thus his newest son.
If you're a military father who breeds kids for enlistment, you should watch this and see the lasting damage it does to children.
It's selfish to do that to your children. They didn't choose to enlist, or have you as a father.
Joining the military? Don't have kids until you're done.
I wish the eldest son all the very best in this life. I hope he isn't killed, harness or maimed while in the military. I hope he gets the help he needs to be okay within himself and to unravel his father's enforced damage. So he can love and respect himself irrespective of his father's views. He matters. He's not the disappointment here. Not in any way.
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