Psych (TV Series)

Truer Lies (2009)

Dulé Hill: Burton Guster

Quotes 

• Tenant : May I help you?

  Shawn Spencer : Perhaps. My name is Shawn Spencer, I'm with the Big Uncles of America program. This is my underprivileged mentee, Hollaback Atcha. He's selling magazine subscriptions as a way to learn business skills. Otherwise, he'd be forced to join a gang if he was still on the streets.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : If I *were* still out on the street... I'd be an OG.

  Shawn Spencer : [chuckling]  You wish.

• Shawn Spencer : Oh, come on, Jules. We all tend to bend the truth just a little.

  Juliet O'Hara : Not me.

  Shawn Spencer : Oh, really?

  Juliet O'Hara : Nuh-uh.

  Shawn Spencer : Does this ring a bell? "No, Shawn, I haven't had any naughty dreams about you." And, "Yes, Shawn, I do wish Gus was never born so that I could be your partner."

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : What?

  Shawn Spencer : True story.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : That's messed up.

  Juliet O'Hara : I never said that, Gus.

• Lyin' Ryan : The night before, I went to this restaurant to get a basket of these things called Fries Quatro Queso Dos Fritos. You know, the ones where they inject potatoes with a four-cheese mixture, fry them trhee-quarters of the way, pull them out, batter them, fry them again, and then serve them with bacon and an ancho chile sour cream? Anyway, as I was sitting there, a car speeds right through the storefront across the street. It makes such a loud noise, I had to turn my head and look, and that is when I overheard the guy with the curlicues on his face tell the other guy at the corner table about the assassination plot.

  Shawn Spencer : [in the observation room]  Can it be true?

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : No way.

  Shawn Spencer : I mean, is it even possible?

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : I couldn't imagine.

  Shawn Spencer : There's no way you could prepare a fry like that. That'd be way to much for the... for the human palate to manage.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : It would be a flavor seizure.

  Karen Vick : Gentlemen, please? Don't be ridiculous.

  Shawn Spencer : She's right. Let's just take a minute here to think things through.

  [pause] 

  Shawn Spencer : They must be parboiling the potato first.

• Juliet O'Hara : Are you all right?

  Shawn Spencer : Yeah. Of course I am. Why?

  Juliet O'Hara : Well, we got the message that you were at the hospital. Something about life and death?

  Shawn Spencer : Oh, right. That. Well, we are in a hospital and as it happens it's filled with both life and death.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : I knew I should have left that message.