- Doug Wilson: [walks into the kitchen and opens the refrigerator] What happened to all the cheese?
- Lenny Botwin: Is that her pimp?
- Shane Botwin: My mom is not a prostitute!
- Lenny Botwin: Well she's definitely a criminal of some kind. Did she rob a bank?
- Shane Botwin: No!
- Lenny Botwin: A Costco?
- Shane Botwin: No!
- Lenny Botwin: Is she a coke dealer?
- Shane Botwin: Um... no.
- Doug Wilson: [walks back into the kitchen and opens the refrigerator] What happened to all the cheese?
- Lenny Botwin: Weed! Your mother's a weed dealer!
- Shane Botwin: Give me back her money.