Great Photo, Lovely Life (2023) User Reviews

Perfect Portrayal of Disassociation

[shayleonia · 6/10 · 10 December 2023]

I'm floored, disturbed, angry, and in utter dismay after seeing this. The bravery needed to tell this story must have been insurmountable. Endless gratitude to Amanda for doing this work and to her sister, mother, and all her grandfather's victims for surviving it.

The unending forgiveness and gifts of contact & affection, even still calling him "Grampa" instead of just "Bill" left me disgusted. It was a reminder at how skewed religion can make us in regard to the forgiveness aspect.

But I have no theory on the contact and affection. Only resentment. I'm sure it must have been difficult and complicated, but it made me angry that he got to experience the joy and love of having his family in his life when he clearly didn't deserve to.

Everyone should see this film, especially if you live with "a secret you shouldn't have to keep".

Hard-hitting and devastating on many levels

[paul-allaer · 8/10 · 19 December 2023]

As "Great Photo, Lively Life" (2023 release; 112 min.) opens, we are with Amanda and her mom Debbie, who are visiting Amanda's grandpa (Debbie's dad) in Florida, ready to finally confront him over the sexual abuses of many young girls all this years ago. He doesn't deny any of it, and in fact goes one further. We then go back in time to the 1970s in Bradford, PA, where he worked as a chiropractor. At this point we are 10 minutes into the movie.

Couple of comments: this movie is co-directed by Rachel Beth Anderson ("Unschooled") and Amanda Mustard, making her directing debut. The movie is a hard-hitting, if not shocking, but certainly devastating look back to the speechless acts of sexual abuse over many years by her grandfather, and the long-term consequences for the family and the victims. The grandfather shows no signs of remorse, zero, and explains it all like you would explain buying a loaf of bread at the grocery store, To Amanda's immense credit, she does not shy away from the difficult moments, and plows on to get to the bottom of this, including the responsibilities of the people around her grandfather, including i=his wife and yes, Amanda's mother. Please note that this will make many viewers uncomfortable, as surely I was.

"Great Photo, Lovely Life" premiered at SXSW earlier this year to immediate critical acclaim. It is currently rated 100% Certified Fresh on Rotten Tomatoes, and for good reason. It started airing on HBO two weeks ago and it is also streaming on Max, where I caught it. If you want to understand the truly devastating effects of a serial pedophile on his victims, his family, and society as a while, I'd readily suggest you check this out, and draw your own conclusion.

Monsters

[GoldenGooner04 · 7/10 · 4 March 2024]

A lot of reviwes are from people who have been affected by Monsters like the grandfather. I don't walk in their shoes and can't take in the pain they have suffered all their lives, not just the abuse but that it is a loved family member who is the abuser So for me this make me angry, I could not understand why they visited that monster, be in the same room as it. It should have been thrown out with the trash not put into a care home, how much did that cost the family? Did the care home know what he had done?

The mother said as they were going thou the clothes "we need to laugh" because she knows she is guilty. She was abused why would she ever go anywhere near her parents again? I know it's easy to say "it's her parents" it's not that easy to walk away. But she left her daughter alone in the house The grandmother was as bad as IT in my opinion she knew what was going on, but done F ALL and then we have the religion BS, it's like the Mafia kill 10 people then pop to Church The old C@@T was not even sorry, in his sick F up mind. It's all good cause Jesus will forgive me As for forgetting I can't comment on that, but i suppose to be able to live your life can you forget? Some people can put bad things that happen to you away deep in your heart behind a padlock, but it still affects them A lot of people are saying Amanda was wrong to make this film, what I got from it, she is angry with her mother more then the Monster as her mother could have got him arrested and she done zero and made it worse, this doc was not just about the Monster IT but also to hurt the mother.

As for the other victims, you can't force someone to appear on TV and the one with the daughter who was preggers seemed fine being on the program We all want to look up to our parents and be proud of them and make them proud of us.

Sometimes you have to admit who they really are and let the world know.

Living alongside the delusional...

[shailosweetkittycat · 10/10 · 8 December 2023]

This really hit home for my own reasons, this made me so sad and so angry! This man STILL believes he is free of any wrong doing, that he is this jovial, sweet man that couldn't possibly hurt a fly... He makes me sick! Furious!

I also really have such anger towards his wife and even their daughter who allowed this man to abuse one of her own daughters.

I am not negating or dismissing trauma and the cycle of dysfunction that does essentially brain wash a victims emotional or moral compass, but since the DAWN OF TIME a mother is designed to protect their children, not continously put them in the jaws of the lion. I don't care what year it was or what societal stigmas were in place, nothing should hinder that instinct.

Also. That other weird, overly defensive, overly chatting couple that completely gas light her Mother and immediate began to preach the word of God and make her pray for forgiveness... UNREAL!!! I was floored either of them even entertained that whole thing, that couple was shady and clearly hiding something too...

This guy is a monster, stone cold and has lived his whole live raping little girls with no repercussions, this is exponentially terrible and shameful.

This took so much courage from her and especially all of the victims, very well done.

Impacts So Many People Suffering in Silence

[Susansgoldens · 10/10 · 7 December 2023]

Was glued to the TV watching this documentary. It's the first time I have watched a show about family members abusing other family members. It's a discussion that usually doesn't happen in families. These ladies faced it in their family head on. Because of the time lapse of the abuse, memories, in some instances, were from so many years ago but very vivid. The bravery of the ladies to dig deep is admirable. The Grandfather, in my opinion, didn't grasp the severity of what his actions did to the people he abused. His words rang hollow to me. Granted he was close to dying but, his words centered more on how he is going to be greeted upon his death. Recently, I learned my Father tried to abuse his Granddaughters when they were preteens. His actions repulsed me. He has been gone for many years but he was never confronted. Thank you for sharing your experience. I admire you for doing this in a public setting. Hopefully it will start discussion's in families that are currently dealing with this issue.

Stunning and nuanced

[wkbhss · 9/10 · 23 December 2023]

This is without a doubt one of the strongest and most self-aware documentaries I have ever seen. Beautiful visuals and nuanced delivery. It feels like I'm experiencing someone's memories firsthand.

The film rings so true to family dysfunction - and the complex ways that the human mind processes that dysfunction in order to protect ourselves. It tracks many years in the life of the family, so we see through the camerawoman's eyes how family dynamics play out both short-term and long-term. It's honest and heartfelt.

So many documentaries go overboard with exposition and oversimplify trauma. This one doesn't. Highly recommend.

Honest and Important

[nfancher · 9/10 · 2 January 2024]

I am a survivor of abuse, and the family dynamic that was captured in this documentary was all too familiar to me. I also have heard stories from fellow survivors that are almost verbatim. It is wild to me just how similarly these events transpire but often they are covered up or explained away. I personally never got the same closure when confronting my abusers as the subjects did in this film. I'm encouraged and impressed that these people were able to be so transparent and vulnerable and willing to confront the truths of what happened to them, and maintain their relationships. It's my great hope that films like this are a cultural tipping point towards accountability and true justice.

This is not a documentary..

[cpcarpitella · 1/10 · 7 December 2023]

..this is a gross representation of a family secret. The "filmmaker" is so self-involved that she has no idea or care for how she is re-traumatizing these victims. As a therapist, and a survivor for sex assault myself, I am actually livid at how cavalier this woman is digging up everyone else's past. In one of the final scenes, she seemingly begs her own mother to be angry about HER OWN trauma; I was in disbelief. This is not how to process generational trauma, particularly when it was someone else's experience.

Besides the true exploitation of the victims, this is a very poorly made documentary. The story peaks within the first few minutes, and the following 90 minutes are just the filmmakers own version of non-consent (impeding on victims life's with absolutely no care). Using victims for her own gain, and somehow without an ounce of compelling storytelling. Please watch Rewind instead- another documentary about a families generational sexual abuse, coincidentally also in the suburbs of PA, and actually well told and healing.

A truly strong family

[waggs-ny · 9/10 · 16 December 2023]

In spite of this person being an absolute, unremorsful monster, his family showed him the compassion and love he didn't deserve and never showed to his countless victims. I certainly wouldn't have been so kind in this situation.

As someone from a family with the patriarch also doing such things, this family's ability to confront his actions head on makes me sad my family never could speak openly about what had happened. Quite the opposite, this was buried deep down and became a shameful secret only part of the family even knows about today.

My expectation is that everybody who watched this documentary or is reading this review has experience to some degree, either personally, or with a loved one some form of sexual abuse. It is staggering and disgusting how pervasive these behaviors are but if we are ever going to slow its momentum it's by being upfront and honest and teaching our children to speak up.

Powerful and jarring movie.

a very moving and necessary documentary.This was an amazing movie about courage in the face of lifelong suffering that results from childhood trauma. As a survivor of domestic

[cooknjp · 10/10 · 1 February 2024]

This was an amazing movie about courage in the face of lifelong suffering that results from childhood trauma. As a survivor of domestic violence that resulted in the murder of my mother and sister when I was 10, I can tell you that forgiveness is a complex process reserved for the victim to contemplate. For those who are criticizing the film maker and victims for not properly forgiving grandpa - and therefore give a negative review... I will tell you that you are propagating the problem of violence against women; you are not a god and you do not have a special understanding of what forgiveness is. Save your judgement, check yourself, and ask your god to forgive you for your judgement of these brave women; ask for greater understanding of trauma that you may serve to lift others up and be part of the solution rather than part of the problem.

Honesty at its best!

[barbbianchini · 10/10 · 22 January 2024]

Honest and moving documentary that reaches deep into your core and begs the questions: Why is it so hard for people to take responsibility for their actions? Why do people stay silent and protect abusive men? It seems sweeping issues under the carpet is a family dysfunction that is not only hard to break but even harder for them to accept that it's a problem in the first place. Great Photo, Lovely Life draws on betrayal, anger, hurt, fear, pain, frustration, sadness, disgust, and deceit. Even in his last days, Grandpa was still acting downright creepy and abusive. Here is is being called at by his granddaughters and his daughter and he's hitting on the camera person. If that didn't speak volumes about the man's psychopathic behavior I don't know what did!

I'm glad it was made.... I wish it had a different outcome for the pedophile. He should have been taken in and charged for committing the crime AGAIN! The cycle didn't stop.

[LillyDerway · 10/10 · 28 December 2023]

I wish it had different circumstances for the monstrous pedophile. Why didn't they seek more people to file against him. He was a serial predator in children, even in his old age. He didn't STOP being an abuser and molester being old. Too many victims that were left behind without closure to see him behind bars. It's so sad to see the victims continue to be in pain from all the suffering from their trauma. A true Closure for victims is to see the person who abused them behind bars. I say that as a victim myself. I wish the mother owned up to her delusion in thinking that it wouldn't happen to her children under the roof of the monsters house. Her mother allowed it to happen to her, she allowed it to happen to her grandchildren. That's the unfortunate reality in life, once an abuser, always an abuser. They continue to sexually abuse and assault children. I broke my silence, I lost members in my family and also gained supporters in believing me. But I also found another victim (my cousin) in my family. As I said, they have multiple victims.

Sometimes, we need to speak the truth. Even if your abuse happened in the past or is currently happening. Victims at a young age don't know or understand what is happening. You don't know until you get older. I kept the silence because I was afraid of not being believed or heard. I became courageous and brave enough to break the silence. Yes, I had therapy and counseling. Group therapy works wonders. BREAK THE SILENCE TO STOP THE CYCLE of ABUSE!

Awful Circumstance. Selfish Production

[zachfrange · 3/10 · 20 December 2023]

Obviously this entire documentary surrounds a horrible human and an innumerable number of atteocities. What no one seems to ask during this documentary, is who benefits from tearing this whole thing open again for the victims...it seems as a self serving documtary where the main character stands on the shoulders of the victims to produce a documentary that none of them asked for.

I hope and pray the victims reach some catarsis and that Amanda Mustard defers any and all monetary benefits and awards to the victims she opens up to the trauma they may have burried.

She seems to actually try to convince people that they are not handling things the way she wants them to. Her own relatives...

Self centered about approach to making a serious issue about herself.

How could you possibly make this about yourself?

Gut wrenching and disappointing.

OMG! Can't finish it.

[thejdrage · 8/10 · 21 December 2023]

Nope. Can't watch anymore than the 30 minutes I have endured with this complex family who was allowed to endure (thanks to the mothers and a horrible court system at the time) such atrocities by a man who explains that they wanted "it". And that he was instructing them.

As a child, I was protected by a Scottish Tiger of a mother from anyone who thought of causing harm or distress.

Sadly, most women have all met these lowlifes in all phases of our lives. Work, play, and in the home of friends who have forgiven their abusers and then turned them loose on their friends. Men also have their versions of this living, breathing tolerated nightmare.

My inability to watch it to the end is because of the rawness of this project and how personal it is. That said, it obviously re-awoke things in me that created much less than a lovely life.

Realistic dysfunctional family doc

[daniray2005 · 10/10 · 29 December 2023]

I felt that the doc portrays exactly how thousands of dysfynctional families get through lifetimes of abuse. Trying to keep secrets that just end up destroying them from the inside and sadly repeating generations. Secrets are an abusers best weapon. I noticed religion placing forgiveness as more important than holding perps accountable seemed to really stunt healing for some here. Many people use that way of dealing with hardship. To place it all in God's hands to deal with..but I say that gives the secrets more power and perps the privilege to continue on their merry way without confrontation. This film highlights how people can mix together(and confuse) the true love and trust children have for a parent (grandparents) with the ill-willed abusers demands for "love", respect. Sexual abuse, secrets and then abuser gaslighting were the main dysfunctional features for this family. I felt we peeked over their wall of secrets and gained some useful insight. I applaud her for shining light into a very dark corner. Was she therapeutic? She tried- but not really. She was realistic and raw. I'm actually shocked she was so brave and vocal- considering the women of her family being so sheepish and controlled. Was there a perfect "accountability bow" on the whole package in the end?... no. She did try, but such is life...messy without the big happy ending sometimes. And it's OK to not be OK. There WAS progress for healing in some and discussion for our awareness and for that- An Absolute Triumph. *Unhide secrets. Talk!! Hold abusers accountable. *

Uncomfortable, but for the wrong reasons

[solis-ivan · 31 December 2023]

What was the purpose? He didnt went to jail again, noone got closure, no laws were changed, he wasnt even confronted the right way, the family didnt heal and he even did his thing one last time in his final days! We can excuse everything with creating "awareness" but its just too trivial in my opinion. I feel she used his whole family suffering to create this documentary. There we're too many shots where she was the "movie star". I know it wasnt an easy documentary to create because of the emocional connection, but i think that affected the whole project. Im just happy it ended.

The topic behind this piece is really serious and has to be talked about (or screamed) but in some points it was just the excuse to show drama.

From a technical stand point i really likes the cinematography and the edition, it makes you feel a lot of things and that is what art is supposed to do.

I cant rate this.

Secrets and the costs of keeping them

[dfloro · 8/10 · 9 January 2024]

Photojournalist Amanda Mustard and filmmaker Rachel Beth Anderson have made a brutal documentary about Amanda's grandfather Bill Flickinger, a self-admitted serial pedophile who abused the female members of his own family and patients and their family members within and related to his chiropractic practice for many years. It took until the early '90s for Flickinger to be held legally accountable for any of his crimes, but even then he served a relatively abbreviated prison sentence (and got released early for his "good behavior"!) The links that Amanda makes to the Christian religiosity of generations of her family (until she relinquished that blind faith) are interesting, with many interview subjects emphasizing that God will forgive even the most prolonged and heinous sins imaginable and then welcome His true believers with open arms into Heaven (playing the "Get Outta Hell Free" card). Flickinger's claims that most underaged girls he victimized "enjoyed" being in his company and his inappropriate touching as much as he did-made me physically ill. Here's what I've never been able to fathom about pedophilia: how can it be sexually stimulating or fulfilling to cause someone to be abused who is sexually undeveloped and/or inexperienced and utterly incapable of understanding what's happening to them (more accurately, being perpetrated upon them)? It seems, not just terrifyingly insensitive, but literally illogical and totally nonsensical. So it's got nothing to do with sex, and everything to do with abuse of power and adult authority. In other words, it's the unmitigated torture of children, and the worst crime I could imagine. Although I don't disagree with some reviewers saying this film is self-indulgent, it's interesting how many believe that the family/victims had the right to hide their trauma from each other and the rest of the world, help the abuser cover up serious crimes and ultimately help him avoid both legal and personal accountability for years. In other words, people's so-called "rights to their privacy" trumps society's rights to know of the threats to their own lives and safety. Rate 8/10.

self serving

[rdmceagles · 1/10 · 10 December 2023]

I found this to be nothing more than a self serving documentary. Giving this evil predator any sort of sympathy throughout the documentary must have been heartbreaking to the actual victims. Saying your conflicted about this evil man and his evil deeds is insulting to the victims. Treating him like he was anything was not helping or healing anyone. I've read that this was no way to try and help victims of sexual abuse because it felt to me like they were actually just trying to get past it and silence would be the best thing to do. Explaining that the grandmother never said anything and kept her silence was another insulting part...everyone was at fault and no one takes any responsibility from the grandparents to the parent...they all knew and did nothing.

Savior complex driven trainwreck

[conservativeequalsfreedom · 1/10 · 24 December 2023]

This is an example of people who take on others perceived issues and feel the need to wrap themselves in said issues to be a savior for these people, whether they want or need one. Her grandfather should be in jail. But his victims need to find peace for themselves. It is not his granddaughter's burden or responsibility to be involved. This is her own twisted way of dealing with the crime perpetuated on her. When she stated while she may never get justice for herself, maybe she could get justice for others against her grandfather, I knew this was a trainwreck. I literally gagged in shock when she wrote potential victims letters asking for information about crimes that her grandfather may have perpetuated on them, with NO CONCERN for those victims and where they were in their own journeys. This is a vanity project for a very self important self absorbed troubled young woman. It's nauseating to watch her exhilaration at hearing the victims after the first thing the victim asked, "How did you find me?" You hear the pain in the victim's voice as she hears about the volume of victims. This creator is just rubbing salt in wounds and her ego is not going to soothe it. And her mother knew for years and never went to the police. She just tried to get her mom to run away. I obviously could not watch the entire film.

Misunderstanding Forgiveness

[becauseofthecats · 5/10 · 20 December 2023]

This film is an okay film. It's about personal experience, so I'm sure to those who've had similar experiences will connect with this film more than I did.

The thing that frustrates me about this film is that all of these people are saying that they want to move past the trauma they suffered, yet they are totally unwilling to forgive their attackers. They clearly do not understand what forgiveness means. Forgiving somebody (for whatever they may have done) is for the benefit of the person who was wronged, not the person who did wrong. Forgiveness means letting go and moving on, not forgetting what happened. In fact, we should not forget what happened, as that would put us at risk of these things happening all over again.

I hope that all of these women will forgive this man, not to excuse or forget what he did, but so that they can move forward in their lives. Otherwise, they may will themselves along through life, but they will do so as victims and they will become increasingly more bitter.

No accoutability for the men

[rondaatkinson · 5/10 · 13 April 2024]

I appreciate that these issues are being brought to light and being talked about, when generations past kept it a secret so that victims suffered in silence. But once again, it was left to the surviving women to deal with the pain and anguish surrounding this and the men were left entirely out of the conversation. None of them was confronted or even exposed.

All the family videos shared showed how the men treated women - grabbing them and forcing a kiss on them, actually holding their heads so they could not get away. None of this was addressed. The talk about the men in the family inviting girlfriends to dinner with the expectation that their wives would serve them at the family table. The abuse went far beyond anything overtly sexual. There was much left unexplored in this family.

Use a Kleenex girl. Please.

[elizabethmeganr · 2/10 · 13 December 2023]

Content was just OK. I couldn't hear the dialogue very well over all the sniffing up of the snot. None of them carried a Kleenex and the granddaughter wiped her tears and snot away with her dirty hands the entire film. Really really distracting as well as unhygienic. I could barely hear any of the dialogue over it plus the sound was terrible in general. A lot of mumbling. Also there weren't a lot of details on what the grandfather did to the young women. It was a little vague. In my opinion, I don't understand why the family did not completely alienate them selves from him after what he did. Seems really unrealistic.