My Best Friend's Girl (2008)
Alec Baldwin: Professor Turner
Photos
Quotes
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Professor Turner : She fucks like an epileptic at a strobe light convention.
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Professor Turner : The truth will set you free but before it does; It's gonna piss you off!
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Professor Turner : See I always knew your mom was the best it was ever going to get for me. And I never asked the more important question which is, was I the best it was ever going to get for her?
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Professor Turner : One of my teaching assistants and a very, very hard working woman.
[teaching assistant exits]
Professor Turner : Last night I fucked her to within an inch of her life. True story. I'm champin' her, head through the headboard, and I flip her over and she screams give me a choker. I play the choir boy and say what's that? Starwiped her five minutes later and she's bugging like an epileptic at a strobe light convention. Now I'm getting scared and as I'm working out the 911 phone call in my head she goes
[makes farting noise motioning away from mid section]
Professor Turner : like an airbag. And that was Tuesday night.
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Professor Turner : Making love? what is wrong with you? what is this some red book interview?