Gossip Girl (TV Series)

School Lies (2008)

Ed Westwick: Chuck Bass

Quotes 

• Chuck Bass : Blair doesn't even want you. She's been crystal about that since we got back.

  Nate Archiblaid : Didn't seem that way when she kissed me at the pool.

  Chuck Bass : She kissed you?

  Nate Archiblaid : Well I kissed her, but... yup.

  Chuck Bass : Was she like... into it? Or was she more like...

  Nate Archiblaid : Of course she was into it, man. What do you think?

  Chuck Bass : Yeah I know, but, uh. You know Blair.

  Nate Archiblaid : [suggestively]  Yes. I. Do.

• Chuck Bass : What ever happened to don't speak until spoken to?

  Dan Humphrey : I just saw you with that key, I know you had it at the party.

  Chuck Bass : Poor little Humprey-Dumpty. Look, regardless of who you're currently sleeping with, you and I come from different worlds.

• Chuck Bass : Why don't I turn that one-piece into a no-piece?

  Serena van der Woodsen : Find a floatie to talk to, Chuck.

  Chuck Bass : Ya know, if my dad and your mom come back from South Africa tomorrow engaged, we'll be brother and sister, and you know what they say, the family that plays together stays together.

  Serena van der Woodsen : Ah, incest, the universal taboo. One of the only ones you haven't violated yet.

  Chuck Bass : Well, I'm game if you are.

  [Serena starts to act like she's going to kiss him, but instead knocks his drink out of his hand] 

• Bart Bass : So. Your new step-brother told me about your problem at school. Frankly, I wasn't surprised given your propensity for recklessness and adventure.

  Serena van der Woodsen : I'm sorry?

  Bart Bass : Don't tell your mother, but... I made a call.

  Serena van der Woodsen : You did what?

  Bart Bass : It was harder than usual. That new headmistress of yours is a new peice of work. I had to go over her head. Sorry I couldn't get the charges completely dropped, but, at least I got you minimal sentence.

  Gossip Girl : One thing about being on the inside, once you get there you don't always get to choose where you stand... or sit.

  Chuck Bass : [Chuck comes over, puts his hand on her knee but she tosses it away]  I was just looking our for my family. The new Van Der Woodsen-Bass library should be completed for Eric's graduation.

  Bart Bass : I can see that Lily and I are going to have our hands full with the two of you.

  Serena van der Woodsen : Okay. Will you excuse me? I need some air.

• Chuck Bass : How glad are you to see our families merge, Sis?

  Serena van der Woodsen : So glad that if you ever call me that again, it'll be the last thing you ever say, Chuck.

  Chuck Bass : I love it. Our first brother-sister squabble. Well, I hope you're going to make yourself available for more missed childhood memories. Bathing together, for example.

• Vanessa Abrams : [after being bribed]  You're sick.

  Chuck Bass : [taking videotape]  You're welcome.

• Blair Waldorf : [Chuck grabs Blair's arm]  Hey let go of me Bass!

  Chuck Bass : Drop your Archibald habit first.

  Blair Waldorf : You know I already have.

  Chuck Bass : Really? A kiss does sort of send the wrong signal, let's not waste time denying.

  Blair Waldorf : You know what, I'm tired of this go ahead and tell him.

  Chuck Bass : Really, you want me to tell him how you slept with me and faked your virginity for him.

  Blair Waldorf : I'll just tell him your lying and who do you think he'll believe? You who bangs anything in his field of vision or me his pure and honest girlfriend of many years.

  Chuck Bass : Oh now he'll believe me.

  Blair Waldorf : Why?

  Chuck Bass : I have proof.

  [Vanessa had filmed them on camera] 

  Chuck Bass : Good eye docu-girl I'll take the tape now.

  Blair Waldorf : You knew she was watching? This is my house that tape belongs to me.

  Vanessa Abrams : Actually this is my footage and thanks to both of you I think I got a new angle on my subject.

  Dan Humphrey : [Dan walks up]  Hey Vanessa let's get out of here.

  Chuck Bass : If you think I'm gonna let you walk out of here without that tape your crazy!

  [he grabs Vanessa's arm agressively] 

  Vanessa Abrams : Let go of me!

  Dan Humphrey : Hey! Last time I checked I still owe you a black eye so unless this is you coming to claim it, stay away from her.

• Blair Waldorf : Enough with the blackmail. Aren't you bored already? I can't avoid Nate forever.

  Chuck Bass : Excuse me.

  [waves the girl that he had been talking to away] 

  Chuck Bass : I didn't say forever. Just until the sight of the two of you together doesn't turn my stomach.

  Blair Waldorf : And when will that be?

  Chuck Bass : Only time will tell, I'm afraid, so unless you want dear Nathaniel to know how you lost your virginity to me in the back of a moving vehicle, I encourage patience and restraint.

  Blair Waldorf : Isn't there someone else you can torture?

  Chuck Bass : Probably. But I choose you.