Chuck (TV Series)

Chuck Versus the Sizzling Shrimp (2007)

Zachary Levi: Chuck Bartowski

Quotes 

• John Casey : The idea behind a stakeout is to remain inconspicuous, you moron.

  Chuck Bartowski : Uh, hello? That's why I used an alias.

• John Casey : Stay in the car.

  Chuck Bartowski : My four favorite words.

• Chuck Bartowski : All right, kicking butt.

  John Casey : What happened to "don't get cocky"?

  Chuck Bartowski : My bad. Professional faux pas.

• Chuck Bartowski : [lighting fireworks]  Oh God. Please let me keep my fingers.

• Chuck Bartowski : So listen, I've been thinking a lot about last night. And, you know, you guys were talking about how this spy could be valuable to us. So I was thinking, what if we could convince her to, I don't know, like give up some... secret stuff...

  Sarah Walker : You mean defect?

  Chuck Bartowski : Defect, yes! People do that kind of thing all the time, right? The Hunt for Red October... uh... White Nights.

  Chuck Bartowski : [Casey stares blankly at him]  White Nights? Gregory Hines, Baryshnikov, dancing their way to freedom?

  John Casey : [sarcastically]  Well, as long as you've done serious research on the subject. You get her to defect, I'll help rescue her brother personally.

  Sarah Walker : Why are you bringing this up?

  Chuck Bartowski : Well, she sort of, uh, just... called me.

  John Casey : She called you? Where?

  Chuck Bartowski : At the Buy More. And I think she might been in the store too, because she knew my every move. She even knew that I had mustard on my tie.

• Chuck Bartowski : Stakeouts are kinda fun!

• Mei-Ling Cho : [preparing to rescue Mei-Ling's brother]  Good. Every warm body helps.

  Chuck Bartowski : I'm sorry... Me? No, no, no, no, no. Look, as much as I wish that I could help you, I can't. I made plans with my sister that are non-negotiable.

  [Everybody stare at him] 

  Chuck Bartowski : But, of course, I know that you wouldn't be in this mess if it weren't for me. I wanna be with my sister and you obviously really wanna be with your brother. We're like one big whacky trans-Atlantic family. I owe you. I'm in.

• Chuck Bartowski : [walking toward Mei-Ling with the clipboard]  I believe you have something for me?

  [she points a gun at him] 

  Chuck Bartowski : Please, tell me that's not real, the gun, not the clipboard.

  Mei-Ling Cho : [Shoves the gun to his abdomen]  Real enough?

• Sarah Walker : An evening of Morgan.

  Chuck Bartowski : Okay, so here's the thing. Uh, he's my best friend. And I haven't gotten to spend any time with him or Ellie this week and so he really wanted us to hang out tonight.

  Sarah Walker : For an evening of Morgan?

  John Casey : I thought being stationed in Khyber Pass for six months was brutal.

  Chuck Bartowski : If you're so sad about not being included, Casey, you could say so.

  John Casey : Dinner with you and Morgan. I'd rather Afghani warlords bleed me from my liver.

  Chuck Bartowski : [to Sarah, about Casey]  He's a happy person.

• Ellie Bartowski : It's one thing to let shrimp go to waste, it's another to stand me up, but to leave me with Morgan?

  Chuck Bartowski : And I feel terrible about that, believe me. I do. You know how much I adore sizzling shrimp. And you. More specifically you. It just, Sarah wasn't feeling well, and...

  Ellie Bartowski : Oh, well, what is it? I'm a doctor.

  Chuck Bartowski : I believe, uh, she had a spastic colon.

  Ellie Bartowski : Yuck.

  Chuck Bartowski : I know. A girl that beautiful with a colon that spastic.

• Chuck Bartowski : I thought you were off this stuff.

  Morgan Grimes : Yeah, well, I'm sorry, Chuck, all right? Daddy needs his fix, you know?

  Chuck Bartowski : You know how I feel about fireworks.

  Morgan Grimes : You know what? To defeat fear, one must embrace fear.

  Chuck Bartowski : I'd rather embrace my limbs. Specifically, all of them.

• Ellie Bartowski : When did we start keeping secrets from one another?

  Chuck Bartowski : You know what? Look, if you'll just, if you'll just let me... explain...

  Ellie Bartowski : There's no need. I figured it out. I know.

  Chuck Bartowski : [Shocked, believing she knows about the spy stuff]  You do?

  Ellie Bartowski : You haven't had a girlfriend for a long time, and you're in love.

  Chuck Bartowski : [Smiles, relieved she doesn't know the truth]  Yeah.

  [Beat, wondering about it himself] 

  Chuck Bartowski : ... I am?