- Prince Frederick: [talking to Kimmy about his wedding vows] And you'll never guess what I rhymed with shimmy, Kimmy. Ugh, bugger!
- Titus Andromedon: [trying on reading glasses] These may as well be a clown in a sewer, because they are IT.
- Kimmy Schmidt: Josh, I can't do this anymore.
- Josh Groban: [in a squeaky, high pitched voice] Is it because my speaking voice doesn't sound like my singing voice?
- Kimmy Schmidt: No, no, it's not that.
- Josh Groban: You're tearing my heart out, Kimmy.
- Kimmy Schmidt: I'm sorry.
- Josh Groban: No, I'm sorry.
- Titus Andromedon: Titus Andromedon is not supposed to die on a mountain like a bored white person! He's supposed to be choked to death at the Met Gala!
- Jacqueline White: [addressing the movie crew that have gathered] But the truth is Titus was never in his trailer. And I guess he's not coming.
- Jenny: [disappointedly] So you lied to us.
- Jacqueline White: Yes, I lied, okay? I'm sorry.
- Crew Guy: But everyone in Hollywood told us we have to believe women all the time now.
- [perking up]
- Crew Guy: If you lied, that means other women probably lie, too.
- Jacqueline White: [looking at the crowd] No, no, that's not what it means.
- Nick: [realization dawning] And that means Time's Up is over, everybody. Women lie, so we can go back to doing whatever we want!
- Jacqueline White: [Trying to calm the crowd] No! My mistakes are only mine!
- [Upbeat music starts, a man drops his pants, and all the men start sexually harassing the closest woman they can grab]