The Magnificent Eleven

I genuinely enjoyed this film. It's quirky, funny and feel-good in a way which left me with a smile on my face (especially the little cameo at the very end)...

It's not necessarily a classic like Full Monty or Brassed Off but it's the best film of this type for a long time and with a very strong cast too.

Why isn't this out there on a much wider release? It's a welcome change from the normal depressing low budget British films about knives and gangs and I would prefer to spend my evenings watching this type of quirky, clever comedy than yet another Danny Dyer wannabe running around stabbing anything that moves.

This should be getting much better promotion than it is!

The Full Monty its not. This is a truly awful film.

It is plodding, predictable, hackneyed, clichéd, totally uninvolving, unbelievable, and just not funny.

I am frankly staggered at the waste of talent on show here, and I can't believe anyone can call it an "excellent" film.

On the contrary, its a complete waste of my time, your time, and theirs.

How on earth it got past the initial stages is beyond me.

There's far superior films out there

Don't buy or rent it.

A charming UK comedy take on the classic Magnificent Seven tale and a great cast, including Sean Pertwee, Keith Allen, Gary Mavers and Robert Vaughn enliven proceedings.

Football rarely (if ever) tranfers well onto the big screen, and this is the perfect example of that.

Irvine Welsh reputedly assisted with the writing, but it's not his finest hour that's for sure.

There's little point summarising the plot, it's just not worth it. Football team, lads, shenanigans, save the club from ABC&D etc. Girls, romances, pals helping each other out, unconvincing gangsters and you get the idea.

The biggest mystery is how this ever even won a £3m budget to even get made! How did it even get distributed? It's so poor and would have been better off having been buried away like other non-event catastrophes.

Just give it a miss.

The Magnificent Eleven of the title are a bunch of boozy amateur league footballers, they are so bad that scoring one goal is seen as the equal of winning the World Cup! Unfortunately because they are so bad they can't get sponsorship and are about to fold. That is until a raucous night at the local Indian takeaway results in the saving of the team. But lurking around with menace is local thug American Bob, who along with his henchman are putting the squeeze on the restaurant for protection money owed.

Paul Barber is the manager, Keith Allen is the captain and Sean Pertwee is the star player! That's enough for British film fans to know just what sort of film this is. In truth in spite of its snazzy cast list, it's not very good, the attempt at making a play on The Magnificent Seven, with Robert Vaughn turning up as American Bob, never really works. However, for football fans, and especially those that have played Sunday league footie, there is charm to be found and some genuine laugh out loud moments. Only a Sunday league player in Britain could understand why a team called Real Sociopath is genius funny.

A select audience only for this one, non Brits need not apply. 5/10