Donkey Punch (2008) User Reviews

What a waste of talent

[krigler · 4/10 · 8 May 2009]

Donkey Punch is more than competently directed, almost every aspect of it is superbly executed - save for the tiny matter called screenplay. The plot is so tired words cannot begin to describe it. There is not one event that cannot be foreseen from miles ahead by anyone who has seen more than two thriller movies in recent years.

The director is obviously very talented, and even the acting is above average compared to this type of fare (I'm looking at you My Bloody Valentine 3D with your silent movie-type overacting) but the plot is such a bore and there is a distinct lack of suspense throughout that instead of generating thrills it almost put me to sleep.

Any real chance of characterization sinks as soon as the characters begin to do awfully predictable and silly things, just for the sake of packing a punch to the audience - which in turn fails because everyone can see them coming.

And to think that British public funding is going to such stinking waste of material and talent is beyond comprehension. I am all for subsidizing mainstream films but Donkey Punch is a knockoff of dozens of movies we have seen, most of them better written.

Just a touch of originality would have elevated Donkey Punch to at least an average level, as it is now it is just not worth the time and investment. On the plus side: the soundtrack is awesome.

Haven't I Already Seen This?

[saxifrage2020 · 4/10 · 9 June 2008]

I found myself at a screening of this at the Sydney Film Festival - one of the producers was there to talk up the 'wild ride' we were about to be taken on which should have been a warning that it wasn't going to be that great. It starts off pretty well with a bunch of very attractive English party holidaymakers (very realistic, I've seen their types all around the world) hooking up for what is going to be a slightly sordid adventure. Once the title is mentioned in the film (Huzzah? anyone) you pretty much know exactly what's going to happen. Yes, it's a thriller but when there are seven people on a boat you pretty much know from the beginning that there's going to be a last man standing. The only real suspense is trying to guess which one it's going to be. All seven characters are complete stereotypes (really bad guy, ruthless guy, good guy and not so bad guy forced to do really bad things; party girl who gets knocked off early; middle ground party girl and slightly less inclined party girl). The characters get knocked off with very little imagination and it requires a bit of suspension of disbelief. I'm not going to ask for the 90 minutes back but I'm certainly not going to recommend it for anyone else to see - especially if they've already seen 'Dead Calm'; 'Shallow Grave' or any other film where a bunch of people are 'forced' into killing each other ...

I guess it was all right

[crystallogic · 5/10 · 20 September 2018]

This film has gotten some pretty low scores here on IMDB, and to be frank, I can definitely understand why this is the case. That said, I didn't think it was so bad and it passed the time well enough. It's just fairly shallow and stupid.

Truth is though that I can't totally resist a story about a party going terribly wrong, and I guess this is basically what we have here. It's pretty much an exploitation homage, and after the eponymous "donkey punch" episode, it goes exactly as you think it will. The characters, even the girls, are pretty thinly sketched and it's hard to imagine them doing anything outside of the story they are in, but nevertheless, the acting seems solid all across the board and everyone in the production did a commendable job. Still, the film doesn't exactly have any dialogue triumphs, and its climax (ha hah) is in fact the wild intercutting of the sex that rises to a fever pitch and then goes horribly awry. It was pretty hot stuff, and then turned to a genuine "oh crap!" moment, and I appreciated that.

Unfortunately what followed didn't give me anything that I didn't learn from 1970s exploitation movies, and those are a hard act to follow. I understand Dead Calm was an inspiration or at least an influence, but i still haven't seen that one. it's probably better than this was. The film didn't piss me off exactly but it didn't leave me with much feeling of any kind, either, and that's bad. The second half is supposed to be tense and psychologically frought, but it's oddly lifeless. It's all a bit vapid and everyone is pretty and stupid. There's a death that reminded me a little of I Spit on Your Grave. Some of the music was fun. Where'd those young boys get that yacht anyway? if they ever said, I missed it; this is not the sort of movie you'll remember a word from, either.

Donkey Pish

[DelBongo · 3/10 · 9 July 2008]

I can't remember the last time that a movie squandered as much goodwill in such a short space of time as this one does. The first half is genuinely terrific, as six lairy, sexed-up twenty-somethings flirt, take drugs and confabulate on a yacht anchored off the coast of an unnamed Spanish island. Its like Hollyoaks as directed by Larry Clark, and it is totally gripping.

But as soon as the titular incident occurs (and the titular incident really does occur; just in case anyone else suspected that the title was merely a jocular come-on) the plot suddenly helter skelters straight into a brick wall; turning into the kind of dated, tiresome trash that isn't only shockingly predictable, but also entirely unaware of its own predictability. The film's twists are broadly apparent a full ten minutes before they occur on screen, which makes for an experience that isn't only boring, but also deeply and repeatedly annoying.

This is one of those thrillers in which every cast member gets a turn playing the volatile psychopath, purely because the script can't get around the fact that the previous character to go loopy has just been safely locked in a cupboard.

It never once stops being faultlessly directed - debutant Oliver Blackburn coaxes some really outstanding performances from his young cast, and there are a couple of devilish moments of genuine suspense and black comedy - but these jiffys are like a tiny number of slowly deflating rubber dinghies sinking into a gigantic ocean of generic pish.

People merely looking for explicit sex will be very well served, but the violence and gore is surprisingly tame for something that's being marketed as a plasma-stained killfest.

A very brief, but nevertheless apt and effective homage to Phillip Noyce's Dead Calm aside (a film so infinitely superior that I feel guilty for even having mentioned it here) this is just a shoddy, witless bore of a film.

And it all started so well.

Erotic and Gore

[claudio_carvalho · 7/10 · 26 December 2008]

The girlfriends Lisa (Sian Breckin), Kim (Jaime Winstone) and Tammi (Nichola Burley) travel from Leeds to Mallorca, Spain, to spend a couple of days together having good-time on the beach. They meet Marcus (Jay Taylor), Bluey (Tom Burke) and Josh (Julian Morris) in a bar where they steal a bottle of champagne for fun. The young men tell that they are the crew of a motor pleasure yacht and they invite the girls to visit the vessel, where they introduce the chief-engineer Sean (Robert Boulter). The seven youngsters use ecstasy and smoke the powerful Russian Ice; Bluey talks about kinky sex including Donkey Punch and Dirty Sanchez; and they decide to navigate to the Mediterranean deep sea to see the sunset. The easy Lisa has sex with Bluey first and then anal sex with Josh; Vic has sex with Marcus and Tammi stays on the main deck talking to Sean. When Josh decides to practice Donkey Punch on Lisa, he accidentally kills the girl, in the beginning of a nightmarish gore night.

"Donkey Punch" begins erotic, with three sexy actresses very exposed, and ends gore after a weird accident. The title refers to a fictitious and mortal practice of anal sex, when the penetrated partner is punched on the head or neck to tight the anal passage and increase the orgasm of the partner. The greatest surprise in the story is that none of the partners use condom, i.e., all of them has unprotected sex. "Donkey Punch" will never be nominated to any Award, but it is entertaining and I liked it. My vote is seven.

Title (Brazil): "Prazeres Mortais" ("Deadly Pleasures")

Donkey DOOOO

[KingArthurUK · 1/10 · 7 May 2009]

i am going to keep this brief... if you value the use of your time this is one to miss.

the film actually had an interesting start -3 young woman on a girls holiday meets a group of lads on holiday in a rented boat, drinks, drugs, flirting and banter... at this point you are still awaiting the film to really kick in, however up until this point, the film is still more than just watchable, which i thought had potential to continue in its tracks... suddenly, the whole film changes direction, they 'lose the plot' so to speak.. after a perfectly filmed porno styled orgy scene where the infamous DONKEY PUNCH DEATH occurs and the the carnage begins... words cannot explain how unrealistic the rest of the film plays out.. completely idiotic unbelievable murderous acts coming at you like flock of seagulls until all but the 'good girl' is left.. it was laughable.

sorry guys! plot-less and pointless - very disappointing.

Refreshingly 18 certificate for 18yr olds

[Chris_Docker · 7/10 · 10 July 2008]

From the sun-bleached fake Mallorca coastline all the way to sangria-soaked rough accents of young holiday Brits, Donkey Punch hits a tacky new high in English cinema. Squarely aimed at the 18-something bubbly-drinking Ibizia types, we have three luscious babes and four gorgeous hunks showing you can have sex, drugs and violence all in abundance, leaving behind the passé pap of American teenage road movies. Donkey Punch is ultra-chic and blows conservative values out the water as we race around on a luxury yacht. The story's realistic, easy on the attention span, and appeals to regular Saturday night audiences, dates and popcorn.

The moral of the story, by the way, is not that you shouldn't film yourself having unprotected group sex while high on various drugs. But that you shouldn't invite your younger brother . . .

There's no mad stalker. There's no deep-seated evil persona. There's just healthy young kids having a good time and accidentally killing each other. Nor do we find any sexist connotations. Men and women are equal here. Both in getting their kit off and bumping up the body count.

Says director Olly Blackburn, "We did a lot of old fashioned, journalist-style research. We went and spoke to people - yacht crews, DJs, and people up in Leeds and down on the South coast." Not forgetting it's a psychological thriller, he adds, "We spoke with a clinical psychiatrist about stress and trauma situations." Which maybe accounts for the realistic note that lifts Donkey Punch above the median.

Kim, Tammi and Lisa are best mates from Leeds. Off on a girls' weekend. They're up for it, giggling, dancing and flirting. They meet up on the beach with three rather nice cockney lads. Marcus, Bluey and Josh. Swigging champagne they've nicked, the lads boast about a luxury yacht they're crewing. They all get back there, where they're met by Sean, who's been looking after things on deck.

The girls are impressed and start spinning the DJ decks. The boys think of an excuse to give the owners if they take the boat out. At sea, you can play the music as loud as you want while swimming, sunning and doing a bit of social drugs (ecstasy followed by something brown with a bit of a kick). So how does it all go terribly wrong? Donkey Punch is an 18 certificate for 18yr olds, and refreshing in that it hasn't been watered down for younger kids or prurient American audiences. There are no 'victims' – just people making some rather rash decisions under pressure – and after a young lad mistakenly takes an urban myth too seriously. It makes no pretensions to be anything other than good entertainment. As a debut feature, it hits the mark and is a welcome addition to the bourgeoning output of original British film.

Absolute tripe.

[rocknrelics · 1/10 · 3 September 2009]

I only watched this because it was on Film 4 last night, and wanted to see if it deserved the bad reviews, well it most certainly did.

I am astounded that Channel 4 saw fit to invest in this vile film that just set out to shock.

It also worries me that we have sunk as low as this in terms of humanity to consider this as entertainment,I love horror movies, but this had no redeeming features whatsoever.

As an aside, if the people portrayed in this film are an accurate representation of young Britons abroad, then I'm glad I don't bother with run of the mill holiday resorts with the binge drinking and all that goes with it.

Not a slasher movie, not explicit, not that good.

[StudioLAX · 15 November 2008]

Firstly this is not a slasher movie nor could it even loosely be described as a horror it can barely even be described as a thriller as it's largely quite boring, the sex is not explicit and the violence not extreme.

I personally didn't feel the film was misogynistic and was one area where the film did succeed by not overtly portraying the females as victims except in places to (unsuccessfully) elicit sympathy and create tension. The female characters are simply one of two opposing sides that develop as a result of the titular sexual act which accidentally results in death which is an alternative to traditional good and bad set ups (as seen in say Eden Lake). If this element had been developed and handled properly it could have lead to an interesting moral conflict instead of lazily resorting to the thriller default plot devices of anger, fear and friends turning on each other.

In addition to the script problems some judicious editing to reduce the running time to around eighty minutes (from 95) would massively help the films leaden pacing which contributes to and ultimately cripples what could have been an interesting and original drama/thriller.

Not nice, but not bad

[neil-476 · 7/10 · 23 July 2008]

This small scale British film was partially funded with Lottery money, and has certain elements of the right-wing press frothing at the mouth for the way it portrays young British people.

I have to say that it's not a nice film. But that doesn't necessarily mean that it's a bad film, or an unenjoyable film.

Three young women from the north of England go on holiday to the Mediterranean. They accept an invitation onto a boat crewed by four young men. What follows is an evening of drugs and sex, culminating in the donkey punch of the title - a mythical sexual act invented by one of the men and foolishly put into effect by one of the others, as a result of which one of the girls dies. The four men and the two surviving girls then have to decide what to do about the dead girl, and the various different personal agendas and deteriorating relationships lead one to wonder if they will all survive the night (it's probably not a spoiler if I say that they don't).

It's fair to agree that the early part of the film doesn't paint the young people involved in a creditable light (with the exception of one of the girls and one of the lads who are somewhat more restrained than the others). It would be foolish to deny that this sort of activity goes on, albeit it may not be as widespread as Outraged of Guildford might think. The final two-thirds, though, after the set-up, are a decent thriller of the "last man standing" variety, livened up by the fact that we aren't waiting for the killer to catch them all one by one, it's more a matter of who is going to do in who.

It's also fair to say that it has the look of a very polished movie from its first-time director, it plays well on the claustrophobic nature of its location (where, of course, it is far from alone), and its young cast certainly go for it in every way - they are all very good.

As something of an old right-wing git myself, I wasn't outraged - I was gripped all the way through, and rather enjoyed it.

Trashy flick for teens

[aldrin1969-1 · 1/10 · 24 August 2009]

Take some young ladies, probably models, who can't act.

Take some young lads, probably models, who can't act.

Put them on a yacht, and throw in a script that seems to have been written minutes before. Get a guy from somewhere, call him a director and tell him to make some astounding rubbish. As it's going to be absolute tat you might as well try to make it controversial. Oh, and there's no budget either so it's gonna look cheap. Yep, it's gonna be something like an English version of Cabin Fever. The film is appalling on every level. The old cliché of 'you'll never get back the 90 minutes of your life' applies here. Only 15-18 year old's will rate this movie, as it's aimed at them. Really, really bad.

Very entertaining

[tcutk · 8/10 · 24 November 2013]

I can't understand why such an entertaining film is getting so many negative reviews. I found Donkey punch to be a good film on so many levels. It had an original story line. Strong parts for the female actors. A nice balanced build up to a crescendo of violence. Fab music and some nice photography.

It doesn't have any big name actors or any obvious lead, but that only makes it more refreshing. I have watched this film twice and while it may not be to everyones taste it is a piece work to be proud of. All in all a great job by Oliver Blackburn and the team. I will be looking out for more of his work, for sure.

Ambiguous

[kosmasp · 7/10 · 9 April 2009]

For a little horror movie this movie, is pretty ambiguous. The title itself refers to a pretty memorable scene, which will be remembered by those who watched the movie, for several reasons. The movie overall has a pretty graphic nature, which won't be to everyones taste. Be it the horror or the aforementioned scene.

While there are a few flaws in the story and/or logic development of the movie, this isn't anything that is different from other horror/psycho thriller movies. Cinematography is nice, acting is decent (for a genre movie) and the overall thrill ride is entertaining enough for the running time. Nice movie then

Donkey Poop

[kenjha · 2/10 · 26 December 2012]

A group of young British men and woman on holiday in Spain go yachting, but things get ugly after one of them turns up dead. This is an amateurish, low-budget thriller that veers from soft-core porn to repellent violence, but is mostly lame, particularly the premise that leads to the first death. It is poorly acted by a group of unknown actors, most making their film debuts. Blackburn makes his feature film debut as director and co-writer but he's in over his head. For non-British viewers, the soundtrack is also a problem if subtitles are not available, as the actors mumble their lines in heavy English accents.

Utter waste of time and money

[ulricjoh · 1/10 · 22 March 2011]

I won't bother going into an elaborate description of the plot. Suffice to say, this was an utterly annoying and stupid movie.

It beggars belief that movies as bad as this one can get more than a two-star rating.

To save people the anguish of watching this nonsense, I'll give you the story in a nutshell.

A group of 20-something men and women get together to have a night of sex and drugs. One of the women is killed by a "donkey punch" during a sexual encounter (this was supposed to be a joke, and she was not supposed to be actually hit).

The group start fighting and try to distance themselves from the killing. In the end, all but one of the actors dies. The last one is left adrift on a lifeboat in the darkness.

This movie was written and directed by two guys and was based on an idea from one of the two. Personally, I think he should have kept the idea to himself...

Slightly More than Been Here Before

[PhilipGHarris · 6/10 · 24 June 2008]

There's nothing too wrong with Donkey Punch but it does suffer from an awful feeling of deja vu.

We have the story of some girls away in Spain for a weekend who get talking to some boys and decide to go to their yacht (or at least the yacht they're working on). As they walk up to the yacht one of the girls hears that they are falling for the boys "plan" and at this point you have to apply your suspension of disbelief goggles as there are a number of other times they'll have to be used.

The girls seem too streetwise to be so stupid as to allow the boat to be driven out to sea and the film takes an age to get to the "thriller" that I was expecting to see.

Once it does get to that point (something you know that's going to happen and the title of the film) it keeps a reasonable speed and tension and becomes quite gory. But the goggles keep having to come on time and time again to allow you to justify their actions.

Some nice scenes include the killing of someone with a flare (which was well handled and quite dramatic) and the point where the female lead breaks through the glass door but as the film moves on its own internal logic becomes more questionable.

Music and Camera work is what you would expect and nothing too special apart from one well handled underwater scene.

Other than that I could take or leave the film.

Uninspired Tedium

[gary-444 · 4/10 · 19 December 2009]

The content of graphic sex, sexual violence, drug taking and murder are aimed at an audience that wants to be titillated, and in this modest aim "Donkey Punch" more or less succeeds.Yet somehow Director Oliver Blackburn squanders reliable staple teen horror fare into an indigestible mess which is difficult to stomach.

Four young men and three young women, party, have sex, and then become embroiled in a deathfest when one of the girls dies during a sex act.The acting is fairly good, the characters are fine and the girls, Sian Breckin,Nichola Burley and Jaime Winston (daughter of Ray) look good and are a teenage boys dream, well "up for it".

A setting on a boat always has dramatic potential, confined space, isolation, no escape. It also has some drawbacks, physically you are limited with what you can do.This is where Blackburn errs.The first half hour of scene setting as the characters get to know each other is fine, and the sex scene is convincing. But once the bloodletting starts everything spirals out of control.The actions of the characters are inconsistent at best, and unbelievable at worst.This is no psychological thriller, if you don't know what to do - kill someone,that appears to be the maxim.Each sequence is so episodic, so stand alone, that there appears to be little link with what else is going on.By the end the dramatic tension has evaporated and you just want EVERYONE to die, but quickly.

Apparently this was shot in 24 days, which is quick. But this is no excuse for an inadequate script and screenplay.

Partying on high sea, end up in gore

[razaul_2000 · 22 November 2008]

First half of the movie is boring, as if you are watching "American Pie" in a yacht.I really enjoyed the second half.Initially I thought they will be attacked by some bloody sea creature but the fun and drugs lead them to danger.

The best party of the movie is, when you think everything is controlled,it unfolds another chaos.There is a tug of war at time among friends,brothers and girls on the yacht for survival.A little bit of good direction could have made this movie much better, the story line is perfect.

I gave 7/10 because its gore movie with a difference.

Donkey Punch

[jboothmillard · 7/10 · 15 January 2009]

I had heard of the sex term from somewhere, so I knew what to expect, but I have to admit, I wasn't expecting this film to be as good as it was. Basically three northern women: Kim (Kidulthood and Dead Set star Jaime Winstone, Ray's daughter), Lisa (Sian Breckin) and Tammi (Nichola Burley), a Mediterranean resort nightclub, meet four eager men Marcus (Jay Taylor), Bluey (Tom Burke), Josh (Julian Morris) and Sean (Robert Boulter), who invite them to party on a boat (belonging to a rich man), with alcohol and drugs (ecstacy and cocaine mainly) at the ready. They get into a conversation about some sex positions, one of which mentioned is the "donkey punch" (when the man is about to cum doing anal, he pulls out and punches the girl on the back on the neck). Not long after, five of them go to the big bedroom and have a near orgy with each other, and unfortunately, trying the "donkey punch", Josh manages to kill Tammi. They decide (just like I Know What You Did Last Summer) to dispose of the body and make something up, but with all the fears and consequences, one by one they are all going crazy either with guilt or anger, and erupting into violence. Being shot by flares, stabbed and dying of blood loss, savaged by a spare boat propeller, suicide (jumping overboard) and accidental hanging (with a boat rope) are just some of the consequences awaiting each character. I was kind of hoping Winstone would be the last to survive, but never mind, each actor gets their moment, the sexual scene is very important and memorable (especially how it ends), and the violence is eye-catching, a very well done low budget British thriller film. Very good!

Bad. Real Bad. I mean bad all the way around bad. Just just BAD.

[ApolloBoy109 · 1/10 · 2 March 2009]

Making so little sense from the first scene forward, Donkey Punch depicts a world where teenagers/college students are just so base (Here's what I mean) "Base motives sordid, ignoble, low, low-minded, mean, immoral, improper, unseemly, unscrupulous, unprincipled, dishonest, dishonorable, shameful, bad, wrong, evil, wicked, iniquitous, sinful. antonym noble." If I was from 17-24 and I saw this movie I'd never seen another movie from the writer or director of this wreck ever again. I would protest. I would say, I am not that stupid. This isn't a horror film, so I cannot forgive them.

The movie purports that all young people are morons. The acting can get no lower (who are these fools who think they can act), the look and sound of the movie is like high school audio visual class crap. The movie sucks.

Don't give these monsters a dime of your money.

Grab your woman from behind, proceed to do the bump and grind, just as you're about to pop, give the girl a karate chop!

[BA_Harrison · 7/10 · 8 October 2010]

Brit horror/thriller Donkey Punch is named after an apocryphal sex act that involves giving your partner a whack to the back of the head as you're about to blow your load, the result supposedly being the rapid tightening of your lover's muscles and a mind-blowing orgasm for you! Of course, bashing someone on the back of the head whilst screwing them is not only considered rather impolite in most circles, but also pretty dangerous, as Josh (Julian Morris) discovers when he stupidly performs the Donkey Punch on blonde slut Lisa (Sian Breckin), one of a trio of hot babes invited to party with his pals aboard a luxury yacht.

Poor Lisa ends up with a broken neck, and Josh and his mates with one hell of a problem: what do they do with Lisa's body and how do they stop her friends Tammi (Nichola Burley) and Kim (Jaime Winstone) from reporting the death to the authorities?

Anyone who remembers LWT's series Ibiza Uncovered knows exactly how outrageous some Brit girls can be on holiday, and Oliver Blackburn's first full-length feature merely takes that notion and sails off into the big blue yonder with it: what would happen if a few of these reckless, loose-knickered, booze-soaked slappers bit off more than they could chew?

Blackburn handles the first half of his film brilliantly, the build up to the titular act being thoroughly engrossing, and more than a little debauched, with the girls partaking of a variety of class A drugs before Kim and Lisa go below deck to give three of the four lads a night to remember, in more ways than one. The sex scenes, in particular, are unforgettable, with both girls stripping off for some extremely realistic rumpy pumpy, lusty Lisa taking on two at a time. There's full frontal nudity from both sexes, and one could easily be forgiven for occasionally thinking that the shagging is for real.

Given the daring nature of the movie's near-the-knuckle sex scenes, it's all the more surprising then to find that the much touted violence that follows is relatively tame in comparison. I was expecting a total bloodbath, but as events spiral out of control all the gore we get is a stabbing, a death by flare ripped-off from Dead Calm, and a disappointing killing via outboard motor that isn't anywhere near nasty enough.

That said, this is still an enjoyable effort overall, and possibly the most shocking film ever named after a spurious sex act (at least until someone is brave enough to make a film called Munging!).

director should be donkey punched

[ian_campbell6 · 1/10 · 17 July 2010]

A friend recommended this and he is not a friend anymore. How did this ever get made? It is ridiculous film completely. Is this all British film funding can invest in- a film bout someone getting killed by a 'slap of the penis'?

Maybe the problem is that most directors need a couple of films before they produce something worthwhile. But how on earth did the director think that a story like this would be a good idea? Im baffled and completely out of touch with his though processes.

Its all a bit 'laddy' for me, film with kids taking drugs, looking for sex with backing rave music, then some 'tarantino rip-off' drama happens. Better British films out there like 'The Business'.

One to avoid at all costs.

Monkey business, donkey punch

[paul2001sw-1 · 8/10 · 22 December 2009]

Olly Blackburn's classy but nasty thriller 'Donkey Punch' takes a number of standard tricks of the genre: the isolated location, the failing communications equipment, a steadily rising body count; and adds one of its own, namely the lethal fall out from the use of the obscure sexual technique of its title. The opening portions are almost unwatchable, as one waits to see who is going to fall victim to this manoeuvre, against a discomforting backdrop of youthful hedonism. Yet the movie only strengthens as it goes on, the director underlays the mounting gore, uses music impeccably, and there are honest, gutsy performances from the cast. Fundamentally, this becomes a movie about what ordinary people will do to survive in extreme conditions; not pretty, but I found the basic psychology believable. Overall, much better than expected.

Tits and ass and gore

[seawalker · 6/10 · 21 July 2008]

I went to see "Donkey Punch" with my Brother and one of my Sisters. My Brother is a man of few words. Here is his review of "Donkey Punch".

"It's just tits and ass and gore." (Shrugs.) "Seen it all before."

Hmm... My Brother was probably right.

Sometimes, though, when the mood strikes me, I can be quite partial to a bit of tits and ass and gore, even if I have seen it all before.

Realistically, as far as slasher movies go, I thought that "Donkey Punch" was OK, Not a great film, but not a terrible film either. Just a bit uneven and not particularly well paced. Once you get past the interminably boring first section, with the 'posh' boys picking up the 'rough' girls and getting down to party on the yacht, the film picks up immensely, with characters deciding to have fun with drugs, fun with sex (in a very explicit, near the knuckle sex scene) and... fun with things that can hurt.

Ah... No more from me, except to say that predictably, for the majority of the characters, this particular party on the high seas is not going to end well.

The worst of British cinema

[egomoz · 1/10 · 30 July 2008]

"Donkey Punch" must have started out as a joke, just like "Jaws the Revenge". But somewhere along the line some idiot thought it wasn't such a bad idea after all and miraculously managed to get funding. Shame as "Donkey Punch" is devoid of ALL artistic merit (to paraphrase Bill Hicks) - it's simply someone trying to be Guy Ritchie at his worst. The story is simple - a group of chavs do chavvy things - like the title suggests it involves attempted sodomy and punching women (ha ha ha misogyny is so much fun)- but like Peter Bergs film "Very Bad Things", things go very wrong. What I cannot fathom is why the director Oliver No-Talent has been all over the UK media and is being held up like the next big promising director when it is clear that the guy couldn't even direct traffic. What happened to intelligent British cinema - Powell and Pressburger? Hitchcock? Nic Roeg? If the director has some taste he will just give it all up and start working for M & S. It will do society a lot of good.