- Dick Johansonson: I hope you boys like big tits and cocaine, 'cos we're taking this show to the North Island!
- Dick Johansonson: If they can send a man to the moon, I reckon I can get this kid at least as far as Takapuna.
- [first lines]
- Narrator: Below you is the ass end of the world. The country you can see is the land known as New Zealand. It's a pretty simple place, really - the North Island - that's the good one - and the South Island, which sucks. Spanning these two imaginitively titles isles is a turbulence stretch of water known as the Cook Strait. It has been swam across and rode across, and thousands cross every day by ferry and plane. But only one man has ever tried to jump it. His name is Randy Cambell, and this is his story.