Two and a Half Men (TV Series)
Don't Worry, Speed Racer (2007)
Jon Cryer: Alan Harper
Photos
Quotes
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Alan Harper : Jake can hear you two in bed.
Judith Harper : Oh, God! Oh, God!
Herb : He didn't hear that!
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Herb : She did teach me to play through the pain.
Alan Harper : Yeah. Tape it up and get back in there!
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Charlie Harper : Oh, and let's not forget how I convinced you Mom's douchebag was your air supply.
Alan Harper : Yeah. Yeah. My breath smelled like vinegar for two weeks.
Charlie Harper : Ah, those were innocent times.
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Judith Harper : What did he say to you?
Alan Harper : Well, basically, he's worried that when he grows up, he won't be smart enough to have sex.
Judith Harper : Why would he think that?
Alan Harper : Because he hears you giving Herb instructions, like he's a blind guy in a mine field!